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Aug 03, 2022
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Summer Jobs
I wake up to an often-ugly world,
but I am frequently reminded
there is an opposite if I pay attention
to the many creatures and their summer toil
Egrets, with punk-rock crowns,
blazing white atop their heads
Seeking low tide meals along the inlet
Moving with grace, smooth like glass
And butterflies with delicate amber wings,
determined to alight on welcoming flowers
as they go about instinctive labors
in their world without intolerance
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 11 months ago
Very good...
but I would have more! Maybe another analogy or two? ~ Geezer.
.
Michael Anthony
2 years 11 months ago
Thanks Geez! Leave them
Thanks Geez! Leave them wanting more, right?
Best
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 11 months ago
I like it
I think it’s fine. (No offense Geez) I like the short format. It lets me fill in the blanks.
Tim
Geezer
2 years 11 months ago
None...
taken Tim. ~ Geez.
.
Michael Anthony
2 years 11 months ago
Appreciate the visit Tim -
Appreciate the visit Tim - thank you!
Best
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 11 months ago
Oh
And great title!
Candlewitch
2 years 11 months ago
dear Michael Antony,
you remind me of Newton's theories. and I thank you for it. for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. my favorite lines are:
as they go about instinctive labors
in their world without intolerance
*hugs, Cat
Michael Anthony
2 years 11 months ago
Glad you liked this Cat! I
Glad you liked this Cat! I struggled a bit with the last word - hatred - judgment - and a few other like words were considered. Settled on intolerance since it seems to me to be an "umbrella" word, where much of the world's ills seem to eminate.
Best