Race_9togo

Jun 23, 2011 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

This poem is part of the workshop:

Cliches and their use

(Read More...)

Unoriginal (Cliche Workshop)

I'm game
Fresh as a summer's rain
A rolling stone gathering
no moss
A mile a minute

My frame
The lesser of two evils
Is a necessary evil
My acid test
Rotten to the core

I'm sane
Nose to the grindstone
The icing on the cake
that knocks
the cover off the ball
and Knocks that ball
Right out of the park

My blame
is love is blind
free as a bird
deeper than the deepest
ocean when
silence is golden
Like a seven year itch
scratched bloody
and silent.

My flame
is hot to trot
when too many cooks
spoil the broth
as scarce
as hen's teeth
It ain't nothing but
a chicken wing
All hands to
the pump.

My crime
is age
before beauty
my name
is keeping it on
the downlow
My claim
originality
a dime a dozen
my reality.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Earth Vicinity (within a five light-year radius), ZZC

Favorite Poets: John Donne, T.S. Eliot, Serendipity, Emily Dickenson, Kailashana, Charles Bukowski, Kabir, Rett, Dalton, W. B. Yeats, William Blake, Rainer Maria Rilke, and many other Neopoet poets; Neopoet has heavily influenced my poetry and my ability to write it well.

Comments

Barbara Writes

14 years ago

nicely done

great write really good flow off my tongue

Race_9togo

14 years ago

Thanks Barb,

but Lord, it makes my teeth grind with embarrassment, it so bad! LOL

Race_9togo

14 years ago

Thanks Ian

I THINK.
LMAO

Race_9togo

14 years ago

Chrys

Don't ever
ever ever
never ever
ever
ask me to write this kind of thing AGAIN.

LMAO

Hooded Stranger

14 years ago

Jim

Jim,

one of your best, this one makes no sense at all which is a vast improvement on your usual stuff!

Kindest regards & LOL!

Eduardo Cruz

14 years ago

Jim

i like what you did with each first word in the stanzas.
Great job!

Eddie

Kailashana2

14 years ago

JIM! Your best write ever!

;-)

lou

14 years ago

Jim

Like me you have made your poem a little list like, it's really hard not to when it's jam packed with clichés. But having said that you have managed to craft a decent poem from the myer LOL!!!

Great job

Lou

raj

13 years 12 months ago

Jim

i know how difficult it is to make a piece out of those Cliches ..it truly is a hair pulling stuff to achieve some kind of stuff out of it..but having a go at it is good enough...

regards...

Candlewitch

13 years 11 months ago

Dear Jim,

I had a little accident which prevented me from being here for the vote. Sprained wrist. Getting better with ice and a removable brace. I would have voted for yours. A fine string of drivel, as intended.

:)
Cat