Cry for help

for help, for hope, for companionship, for recognition. I really like this, especially the metaphor of dead leaves fallen from the old oak tree -- very good! Hope it's ok w/u, I'd like to offer a couple comments to polish this up? In the following lines, there are a couple of typos -- "I can’t balance, my need and my desease Will she? set this broken man free I sent out my cry, does anyone recieve?" "desease" s/b "disease", and "recieve" s/b "receive" - remember the old rule, "i before e, EXCEPT after c"? I look forward to more of your evocative writing! Reverend Bec Hudson Shine Your Light It's the ONLY Way to Get Rid of the Darkness!

the repetition of "Will she?" is AWESOME, as is the placement of the question mark!! Reverend Bec Hudson Shine Your Light It's the ONLY Way to Get Rid of the Darkness!

...have to agree with the rev,the Will She reps work very well.The typo's ,we all make mistakes ,nobody's perfect,lol.Again great read! Title tells all.Hope help has come. Lacy, Where power corrupts,poetry cleanses.

The questions repeated mid line throughout really drive the poem forward for me. A cry for help, beautifully expressed. :-) Kaz It's impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.

"I sit here as I die, addictions consuming my insides It’s cold ,when your waiting" Beautiful! and the repetetion of the question "will she?" had its effect in the poem. I loved the whole thing! --- I am here to learn. So, teach me. I M

you used the past tense of I sent shouldn't it follow through then in saying the wind carried? the rest of the poem stands as is Chrys

i like that as you read this poem it pulls you in. you feel it as you read and in the end totally relate. great job.

Very nice, very nice. I was afraid it be emotioinal or whiny and it was neither. It compels the reader to finish. There is no one line to point out because they are all so beautiful and powerful. I'm happy I took the time to read this. I applaud you. Any negative comments at this point should be disregarded and pointed out as moronic. Change nothing. Except the good old spellin typos :)