Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Elaine

She had a stunning, breathtaking beauty,
her eyes were strikingly blue,
they were lively, vivid and witty,
they were azure and they were a splendor to view.
Her face was so very exquisite and pretty; 
she had a complexion with a gorgeous hue.
She presented a persona so smart, so quick and witty,
she was divine, lovely  and truly gracious;
She was also persevering, dynamic and ambitious,
and she had great dreams and aspirations, her visions flew.
Yet, she was open, candid, gentle and courteous.
She had romantic and sensitive traits; her noble ideals forever grew,
she was giving, she cared, her kindness proved marvelous.
Her inner qualities were just too good to be true.
Her name was Elaine. He loved her ever so much, he simply knew…

 

 

 



— dsaranti, Apr 22, 2008

About the Author

Country/Region: GRC

More from this author

Critiques

M

MeanderS

18 years 1 month ago

hey! you did it again. I

hey! you did it again. I dunno everytime you just leave me speechless. I wonder what is that, that makes your poems-so simple-so appealing, appealing to the soul. hey, jus don't think i talk too much..but really your poem does it. everytime it just paints a magnificent world for me. n its indeed beyond imagination; what it must be doing to you. That inspiration of your Eliane touches me here...like the feather of a faerie spring breeze..can't tell you any more. All da v.best!Love.
D

dsaranti

18 years 1 month ago

Thank you!!!

Well, thank you once more. You know, when I went to high school in Greece many years ago writing was my worst subject. I guess Its the experience of all these years but, mainly my love for Elaine that inspires me so and makes me write poetry,. I can find no other explanation. She is my "muse" you see. Its all because of Elaine. Take care, Dimitri Dimitri Sarantis
ET

Evadne Terra

18 years 1 month ago

Interesting

Now, I really can't see anything wrong with the poem, except some rhythm bugs if you are going for an even flow. Also, the repetition of the word "was" is slowly driving me crazy as I read the poem. If you were to try to cut some of those out and edit the non needed words, not only would your message be enhanced but your poem would flow better as well. Your title intrigued me, therefore I would consider it a success, that and I love the names of people as the titles of poems. Aside from needing to cut it down, I believe your beginning was good, your ending satisfactory if expected, and your language use had me sucked in. Very descritpvie adjectives. Write on, my friend. Eva.
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

Life Is

I have been thinking about your poem Life Is and I could myself say a subject IS rather than LIKE A or AS A, though I only use similes and not consider other qualities -For some reason I like the word candid in this particular poem ,there are different feelings towards people when they are candid ,you may not like it ,or you may- I might be saying the wrong thing i, i am going to say it anyway, a poem Solely for example on Elaine being Candid might be an idea i d'ont know this is just giving a for instance-
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

I am going to say this cos 2 e-mails sent about this poem

does it matter a didly squat if someone is beautiful and smart, maybe love runs a little deeper when you love someone who is dyslexic,drops many faux pas , looks like a bulldog and farts a lot-I myself would not be romantic material for a person such as yourself-Are you for real ,or is this a St george day prank? If it is a prank kindly refrain-If it is not a prank sincerest apologies this woman has something i aint got-
D

dsaranti

18 years 1 month ago

Reply

I agree with your philosophy that real love can indeed be between very different people. I agree 100%. In this particular case Elaine is for real, just as described to the last iota. But, and there's always a but, we have so much in common as described, but I'm double her age! So you see... Your friend, Dimitri
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

May i ask a question

would you love a woman older than yourself with false teeth , grey hair,and she was slow witted ,however for example she hoped for world peace and equal pay , say if you did not find Elaine ?-see Sonnet Shakespeare 1st line Shall I compare thee to a Summers' day , get back to me when you have read it-I must re-read it myself-
D

dsaranti

18 years 1 month ago

Reply

Perhaps I would love an older woman as you described. I don't know what the future would bring... Maybe not though because my main attraction is to women with intelligence and romantic feelings. Mostly younger women. As to the sonnet I believe in the first line Shall I compare thee to a Summers’ day. I believe in eternal love and I also believe in life after death. So I think Shakespeare (if I read it correctly) is right in answering the first line question with a big no. What do you think of all this? Dimitri
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

Dimitri

D'ont know i like thick simple folk ,intelligent beautiful smart asses send me psycho-thats the gut reaction to question-sorry-
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

You

are trying to say something to me? Can i make a confession and i am really a wee bit scared to make it, i do not really like that Sonnet, did'nt have energy to go down library to read it-
D

dsaranti

18 years 1 month ago

Sonnet 18

Shall I compare thee to a summers day Sonnet 18 William Shakespeare Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer's lease hath all too short a date. Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, And often is his gold complexion dimmed; And every fair from fair sometime declines, By chance, or nature's changing course untrimmed. But thy eternal summer shall not fade Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st; Nor shall death brag thou wand'rest in his shade, When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st, So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee. Shall I compare thee to a summers day Sonnet 18 William Shakespeare
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

I

like the fact that Elaine is persevering-thank you D-
D

dsaranti

18 years 1 month ago

Reply

Thanks for your comment. Actually that's what she calls me ..."D" Dimitri Sarantis
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

Thank you

For thank you-you have spent time over me -thankyou for e-mailing Sonnet 18- Elaine is a very lucky lass to have found you-Regards pinksheep, Lesley.
P

pinksheep

18 years 1 month ago

Sent private message for some reason ,say it here now

This Sonnet above not sonnet i was read to , the sonnet i was read to was still full of love and tenderness yet the lady in question was severely lacking, he loved her deeply nevertheless -Thankyou Dimitri for taking the trouble to type Sonnet18 it is beautiful and crystal like, going to state obvious, Shakespeare is a great man ,i wish i could place that better,i wish i had the words -Regards Lesley-pinksheep-Also i think both sonnets are equally as valid though my favourite is sonnet 18 the one you typed for me , the above-

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.