Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

The Doll House

Behind the scaled-down images there lurk
the scaled down dreams of future lives-- perhaps
of incarnations silently recalled
by little girls with vision far less blind
than little boys, who would forsake the gate
and scarcely see the whitewashed picket fence
along Peace Lane.

We walked together, she and I, and gained
or lost a century without a care,
then pausing there untouched by age or time,
were suddenly at home, and though it was
too much inclined to the postiche and far
too lovely, she and I could then perform
a step into dimensions that
I only thought I knew.

Of course it was a given, she would lead
me to another view, though I protest
a movie-set facade so much a part
of someone else's dreams, for it spoke more
of me than comfort would allow. I saw
a book of life in which the pages mocked
my own somnambulistic journey home,
my own defense against reality.

And then we saw the open side, and there
the little rooms cut out, showed little beds
and chairs that may be moved about, but strange...
the tiny people always stayed away
as if the president would come to call,
and they are suddenly unworthy.

There the little souls might sleep
or sip at tea with giants watching, if
they dared, but no, the house is empty, much
too quiet, too pristine, and even presidents
would presidentially demur.

She took my hand, and asked me if
I like it. I, too, broke the silence, "Yes.
I think it's grand. Might it be one that you
would live in?" "No, it's beautiful
but never home enough,
for me."
                  ~
 

— Synchro, May 13, 2008

Critiques

infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

18 years 1 month ago

I like it..

Some very good lines in here, Synchro. would love to know what this piece is about. Guess I'm not quite grasping the greater meaning. ~Lynn (Jess K.) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ~ "Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the hell is the ceiling??"
S

Synchro

18 years 1 month ago

Hmmmmm

I think I'll let you puzzle it out for a little while, Lynn. :-) Yours in peace, Synchro
asiajy

asiajy

18 years 1 month ago

Welcome long overdue

But welcome anyway. I especially enjoyed the lines "There the little souls might sleep or sip at tea with giants watching, if they dared," Deeply imaginative with great literary imagery. Seems like a glimpse into the mind of a little girl. I may need to puzzle on it for a while but its worth puzzling over.
A

Amaranthine

18 years 1 month ago

Doll House

I remember doll houses and you have captured that mindset well - how little girls dream of the perfect house - beautiful and everything for show - those tiny cups and perfectly organized rooms, but even then we know - this is pretend - to look upon and dream, if we could, we really wouldn't want to live in that fairytale- seems rather pointless to spend so much time dreaming of something we don't really want - much like our ideal weddings all for show - far too often - maybe that is why so many get divorced before their fifth anniversary - they just wanted to play house? I liked the poem and think you did a great job - putting us there - being watched by giants - curious about those tiny empty rooms - and pulling memories out of our own tiny hope chests of forgotten days. Sincerely, Amara
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

18 years 1 month ago

And puzzled I have...

I'm probably totally off the mark, but my first thought was that you were writing in the third person (looking in, so to speak) on a past relationship. The other thought was a want to revert back to childhood, but I scrapped that idea as this piece kind of seems to be talking about a bad experience. ~Lynn (Jess K.) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ~ "Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the hell is the ceiling??"
S

Synchro

18 years 1 month ago

Neither is correct, Dwarf

and as a matter of fact, I am so out of touch that I believed that doll houses might still be in vogue....so it was a commentary on human acceptance, together with observations about the fascination with same, in view of an adult look at the possibilities. While I was never very much fascinated with doll houses, I did (and still do) delight in reflection upon the implications...on both real life, upon the psyche, and upon imagination. Yours in peace, Synchro
P

Pleides

18 years ago

Takes me back to a magic time

when I had a doll house that I loved. Do wish I had kept it and wonder where it is now. Such a subtle poem and beautifully crafted...these lines... are my favourite There the little souls might sleep or sip at tea with giants watching, if they dared, but no, the house is empty, much too quiet, too pristine, and even presidents would presidentially demur. Thanks for posting it. Pleiades
Kailashana

Kailashana

18 years ago

Has anyone seen or read the

Has anyone seen or read the play "A Doll's House" by Henrik Ibsen? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Doll's_House ~Anna Stupendous poem.. so full of room for thought. ;-) ~Anna I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.