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M
MEL

Split Second Carnage

  The sound of sirens in the distancea common sound around here..Tyres screeching on the wet road..."SMASH"!!!....then silence. As if someone turned the volume up,screaming and chaos erupts.Seemingly oblivious at first,I attend to my motherly duties..But as we walk outside,the carnage lay before us...twisted metal, flashing lights… People watching on,It's hard not to stare..Even harder not to feel despair!!Paramedics, Fire Services, police...even in the most desperate of times,they are there to save lives..I watched on in awe,my subconscious mind praying,for those being pulled from the wreckage. This is how short life can be,Someone you know,someone's husband, wife..Mother, daughter, Son... They eventually got that individual outand took them to hospital,cleaned up the chaos, secured the sceneperformed the call of duty..then went on their way.And life went back to the way it was 2 hours agolike nothing ever happened... 
— MEL, Jun 09, 2008

About the Author

Country/Region: USA - Florida

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Critiques

RSScheerer

RSScheerer

18 years ago

Mel

I think what you've really written here is a basic account of what happened, but it has the capability to be a great poem. The best parts: "This is how short life can be, Someone you know, someone’s husband, wife.. Mother, daughter, Son…" and "And life went back to the way it was 2 hours ago like nothing ever happened…" If you could turn what you witnessed into more emotion (less detachment - because even though it's obvious it affected you, it seems like there is a thin veil of separation), build it around these two parts of what you have written, this piece would be an even better tribute to those rescue workers. Does this make sense to you? I feel like I'm having a hard time explaining! Best, Ronda

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