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DarkinAZ
Aug 26, 2008 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Broken Road

"Take me" says the girl
I wed so long ago
"make me believe
I should have never let you go."

"Play with me" says the boy
who used to smile at me
"prove you love your son
who is left alone crying."

"Take me" says the drug
I met so long ago
"make me number one
just let that girl go."

"Play with me" says the drink
who used to make me smile
"forget the little one
he won't miss you after a while."

"Forgive me" says the man
to her acheing heart
like he always says
"I will try a little harder."

and silence befalls his son
a father too ashamed to speak
for all the promises made
not one of them he could keep.

Just a lonely and battered soul
broken and alone
left shivering in darkn'd alleys
finding southern comfort in the cold.


— DarkinAZ, Aug 26, 2008
More from this author

Critiques

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

17 years 9 months ago

Beautiful poem

Smiles:) Barbara I like the way you clean the house in your poem. making a good impression is always a plus. nice write.
Rett

Rett

17 years 9 months ago

Don't forget to bathe

Wash behind the ears, brush your teeth and comb your hair. Oh yes, the most important thing "put on clean underwear as you might get in an accident?" Never understood that one because if I get in an accident I'm probably gonna soil them anyway. *LOL*Saw the finniest thing on Leno last night. an advertisement for mens underwear with a hidden pouch for your money "with realistic looking skid marks for safety". *ROTFLMAO* Respectfully, Rett: "If life is a bowl of cherries, why am I in the pits?" Erma Bombeck
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easylife_2

17 years 9 months ago

And splash on some perfume

Was fun reading this one,don't know you could be this funny,very nice one.Thank you.
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

Cologne...

men do not wear perfume...LOL Thanks, Mark
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easylife_2

17 years 9 months ago

Forget the semantics

wear a cologne,spash on some perfume blablablablabla.Just smell nice in anticipation of the 'Queen'.LOL.A nice one I must say again.Thany you.
CH

Cynthia Henson

17 years 9 months ago

List .......

I always make a list and mark things off as I get them done. You'll get it done. Nice write, Cindy
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

hmmm...

Thanks, Mark
weirdelf

weirdelf

17 years 9 months ago

and whatever you do

don't forget to get rid of those magazines with the great articles. Really impressed with your emotional crafting here, the humour lowers ones guard for the poignant ending. A couple of the yoda-istic grammatic inversions for the sake of rhyme bother me a little, but only a little. cheers, Jess
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

Hey, I like them articles!

thanks my friend, I really appreciate your comments and the laugh. Have a great evening Jess. Your friend, Mark
Rett

Rett

17 years 9 months ago

If y'all are talking about Playboy

I buy them for the pictures. To hell with the stupid articles. *LOL* Respectfully, Rett: "If life is a bowl of cherries, why am I in the pits?" Erma Bombeck
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prayersbyPatty

17 years 9 months ago

Nice poem Mark

I am glad things are looking up for you............... Hope you took the advice I gave you about the kiss No perfume no, don't listen to that. Best wishes, Patty
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

Well....

Sincerely, Mark
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 9 months ago

Mark

If the original (which I remember) had made it to Evolution, I'd congratulate you. Your revision is top-notch, though.... I... Gee, how stimulating. I wish you'd put your originals back - not everything was bad, you know. As you can see, mine are still there. It saddens me how willing you are to forget friendship. ~Jess ---------------------------------------------------- "I hope no one asks me to show them the ropes; I have no idea where they are. Maybe I can pull some strings and find out...." - George Carlin
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 9 months ago

Mark

See my last e-mail - might help. ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- "I just read an article on the dangers of drinking.... Scared the crap out of me. So that's it! After today, no more reading!" - Lex M.
Linda Moses

Linda Moses

17 years 9 months ago

Mark

I like the rhyme, I like the poem. Congrations on spotlight. there is one thing, if I may, you use "to" instead of "too" ( a father too ashamed to speak).
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

Thank you Linda...

As always, appreciated. Sincerely, Mark
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MEL

17 years 9 months ago

Am I misreading this?

Mel Inwood For me, this poem was very moving. I found sadness, a marriage breakdown, a child without a father, a sad lonely man who found more joy in drugs and alcohol than his wife and son! Hit home for me..perhaps I read it wrong, can someone point out the humour please?? Cheers Mel
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DarkinAZ

17 years 9 months ago

No humor...

the prior comments were left over from an overwritten poem, You indeed found the emotion of the new write. Thank you, Mark
Janice Pearce

Janice Pearce

17 years 9 months ago

Broken Road

I really, really loved this one Mark~ "There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you." Will Rogers
Kailashana

Kailashana

17 years 9 months ago

wellllllllllllll. You

wellllllllllllll. You *cleaned up* real good, if you ask my opinion and of course you didn't but I'll tell you anyway, oh, and btw. I liked the poem too. ;-) Cheerios! ~A
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prayersbyPatty

17 years 8 months ago

Mark

I agree with Mel. This is a sad poem. Remember, alcohol makes depression worse, Antidepression pills do help. No offense, but they changed my life! I no longer go off on people. There are still mountain tops and valleys, but they are not as steep. respectfully, Patty
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W.C.Wampler

17 years 8 months ago

This poem ( Broken Road} kicks ass

Right now I am dealing with a friend who is lost, and far from the road to recovery. I wish I could send your poem, but 'they' would not see it. Send me a link to your work. wcw
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DarkinAZ

17 years 8 months ago

Thanks for being a fan!

I am glad you like my work. Just click on my profile and you can veiw all my writes. Thankfully, Mark
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

17 years 8 months ago

Broken road

Well my friend I know of a few who have taken this road and the heartache of see of their struggle. But they sucumb and are drawn back again regardles of help assisted. It is hard to see this, you try to help. But some people cannot be helped but we still try. try and give hope maggie Electricblue
Kailashana

Kailashana

17 years 8 months ago

The broken road is our story

The broken road is our story of life... as has been said... you can't step in the same river twice... but it sure as hell feels like it at times... Really friendship and love is all we have to keep us warm.. no comfort better. And a hug. (((((((((Mark)))))))) I know a cyber hug is missing something... ~A

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