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t. reflexion
t. reflexion
Oct 01, 2008 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

MARRIAGE DANCE

MARRIAGE DANCE Etim asked his wife to born for himShe turned and took a wary lookPerplexed, he stepped into a stream,The stream turned into a big riverThis swelled to become a whirlpool Atim bought half a kobo worth of saltHer angry husband poured it awayWhen she asked him why?He beat and almost killed herA whistle blew and they sang He danced here and there, in sweatShe too danced around and twistedThe steps and patterns you seeAre the struggles for the troubleBrewing in the school of marriage Be careful who you agree to marryNot like boy or girl friend businessMarriage is a very serious matterWhen the rites have been performedTo bind you till death, to part





  
— t. reflexion, Oct 01, 2008

About the Author

Country/Region: NGA

Favorite Poets: Inspired by an article in an old manuscript , It reads:, AXIOMS OF PERFECTION, In the physical order – In the realization of the dream of beauty, In the moral order – In the realization of the dream of love, In the intellectual order – In the realization of dream of poetry, In the spiritual order – In the realization of the dream of the mystics

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Critiques

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purplemoondoll

17 years 8 months ago

This tells a great story -

This tells a great story - but it could benefit from a little editing - etim or atim? The consitency isnt quite there yet - see what you think - BUT I liked the story and will certainly come back and comment again if you decide to edit it. Kaz It's impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.
t. reflexion

t. reflexion

17 years 8 months ago

Kaz

Thank you for stopping by to read and comment. The wedding day dance continues in a more serious form through out marriage, the expectations and dissappointments are all interwoven in our daily lives, and our reactions form an enfolding dance pattern for us to behold. The names were chosen in line with the gender, Etim for male and Atim for female, like Christian and Christiana. I don't know if another set of names would make it clearer and help in the flow, they came into my mind because of their closeness. In all, I appreciate your contributions. Best wishes. T.
t. reflexion

t. reflexion

17 years 5 months ago

I like this

I like this poem. The poet writes of his/her convictions of the love from 'Mahoghany Monogomy' and says it is divine. The divine nature of this love makes it a design for just 'you and me'. it should also be noted that love is a two way thing when it concerns humans. where it is one way, the result may be infatuation or possessiveness. As the saying goes, 'In a life of give and take, learn what it takes to give'. Best wishes. T. NB: I should take it that 'Mahoghany Monogomy' is your way of personalizing Mahogany Monogamy.
t. reflexion

t. reflexion

17 years 5 months ago

My opinion...

I may be on the minority on the subject of marriage as it might not reflect that which is purely African, where the men take everything and the women are seen as appendages. Pardon me, my view is democratic, if I should borrow a political term in this context. The role of man or woman in marriage should be complementary, so I recommend that husband and wife should be friends first. I do share some feminist views where the women are not at war with the men. Best wishes. T.

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