orgami

Nov 16, 2008 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

midnight status

white is the darkness of light
pallid
falling soft as ash
soothing the passage
of sounds

lonely cars

trees lingering with
gnarled arms
reaching
gathering free
bouyant dreams
from winter
dead gardens

leaving damp steps
where i take
my year weary eyes
connecting the circle
of streetlights

I dont need to look back
I dont need to look up

there is just the ebony
ocean smooth beating
slowly in my soul
the raging voices in
my skull
the tears standing
like stones in a
barren field

— orgami, Nov 16, 2008

Critiques

Jesse.D

17 years 6 months ago

this is perfect

RSScheerer

17 years 6 months ago

midnight status

So many moments like these crowd our lives. Your words bring them to a place where they cannot be ignored. ~ Ronda

Jo Latimer

17 years 6 months ago

Beautiful

That's all

Janice Pearce

17 years 6 months ago

midnight status

~O Once again you brought me there~ _____________________________ To write a touching poem, you must gently stir the soul, if it brings forth tears or smiles, then the story was beautifully told. ________Janice Pearce_________

washing tears

17 years 6 months ago

Ebony Ocean

i really like the image of the "ebony ocean", that really stuck out to me, this is a great poem, thanyou for sharing wshington fear

themoonman

17 years 6 months ago

O...

This poem of yours needs a live audience to hear it... it flows excellently... even out of my old mouth.... really enjoyed reading this one... Richard

infinite_dwarf

17 years 6 months ago

Orgami

I like your gentle ash reference. Such a lovely poem, from a lovely poet. You astound me again.... ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- - "The term "paranoid" would seem to indicate a lack of preparation.... I prefer to be labled "hypervigilant"

Rett

17 years 6 months ago

There are so many good lines in this

I couldn't begin to separate them. Beautiful write. I can see you standing in a spotlight looking out over a dim-lit audience and reciting this while they sit there dumbfounded. So many moments like this in my life. Well done Orgami, Well done. Respectfully, Rett: "Did you ever notice that the politicians who want to ban gun ownership are the very ones that should be shot anyway?" Rett: 2008

poewriter58

17 years 6 months ago

Steven

Congrats on spotlight. This has to be the best you have written. The imagery is astounding , but I expected no less from a poet such as you are. Simply beautiful Chrys

Mohammad Yamin Iraqi

17 years 6 months ago

Midnight Status

Orgami, This is a splendind poem portraying a lonely man walking by the street lights with 'tears standing like stones in a barren land'. A beautiful poem that takes the readers with it.

infinite_dwarf

17 years 6 months ago

All right O!!

Congrats on Spotlight, my friend. ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- - "The term "paranoid" would seem to indicate a lack of preparation.... I prefer to be labled "hypervigilant"

W.C.Wampler

17 years 6 months ago

midnight status poem

ORG, I've read this poem a dozen times in a row. There are excellent lines in it. "gnarled arms", "winter dead gardens" "year weary eyes".. . Powerful works,,, you reach writers. I try so hard, but this is so far beyond me, I don't even know how to learn from it. wcw

weirdelf

17 years 6 months ago

Don't let it get to you WC,

its like trying to learn from Coleridge in the 19C or Ginsberg in the 20c, Orgami is the finest poetic voice I have heard in the 21c, don't compare, write your own or despair. cheers, Jess

Linda Moses

17 years 6 months ago

Orgami

Truly beautiful. My writes seem so childish compared to yours. Congrautlations on the Spotlight.

orgami

17 years 6 months ago

In Kindest Regards!

My fellow poets all of your writing is beautiful we are worldly seekers taking all the different perspectives of descriptive word and passage I am deeply honoured that you find my poems greatly and aspire towards something everyone has something to offer something to hone to craft or to let go and let the poem find you Thank you Weirdelf But you were always there helping me And still are Linda your poems are not childish but full of innocence and wonder and i am reminded of this each time I carefully read your poems thank you everyone for this spotlight moment

professor

17 years 6 months ago

This is really good

and i agree with all that has been said already. Every so often my friend you come up with a poem that really blows us all away and this is one of those. All the best Keith (PS there is a typo.. should be "field")

Race_9togo

17 years 6 months ago

Your poem

Wow, that's what I'm talking about, a choice of simple words that together are so much more than the sum of their parts. They fill the soul, and bring forth powerful emotional response. Absolutely beautiful. Well done indeed.

Sam Vargo

17 years 6 months ago

Well done!

Great imagery. Nothing's wasted here. A strong poem is every respect - Bravo!

Barbara Writes

17 years 5 months ago

O

Great poem I came back for another read this is a at home and peaceful poem. Congrats on spotlight, the best you've written Respectfully Yours, Barbara

Marius Surleac

17 years 5 months ago

indeed midnight status

There is an inner rush, a sort of dualism between perceptions. The sensations are well described here. The self-imposed "I don't need to" suggests a sensation of fear, but also a self-trust. I like it. Well done. Best wishes, Marius

themoonman

17 years 5 months ago

O...

if I could vote 5 again... I would! this is an excellent write.... and it gets better with each read... Richard

Dolor

17 years 5 months ago

This poem pushes me to the

This poem pushes me to the ground, then lets me see my decay. It's that strong. Amazed, Diana.

Rett

17 years 5 months ago

Congrats Orgami

As Richard said, if I could vote another 5, my Canadian friend, I would. Such a great write. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

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