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Sep 01, 2011
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Yes,I Shall Wait
Oh my beloved,
As you go off to war,
I shall wait your return
In one piece
I shall be a single teen aged mother
Till your return.
Hopefully, your return
Is not with mournful trumpet call
Or Colours dipped on cobbles bare
As normally many do
Till then I shall await my Love,
For you,
As a widow
At this young age
It wouldn't do
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Candlewitch
13 years 10 months ago
Hi Loved,
Nice work! But consider this:
Instead of:
Till you return,
Hopefully, your return
Till your arrival,
Hopefully, your homecomming
always, Cat
loved
13 years 10 months ago
Yenti AND Cat
hope this piece
can also now
be to rest
Amen
Race_9togo
13 years 10 months ago
Loved
This is good, but I don't understand the last two lines.
loved
13 years 10 months ago
thanks a great deal
in the repeated edits
the typo over came me
.Thanks for the cute observation
grateful
scribbler
13 years 10 months ago
hi loved
A good tale of what many young wives are going through. I agree with Jim about the last 2 lines though..........stan
loved
13 years 10 months ago
Thanks Stan
the typo has been blasted
sorry....
my above remarks do accept
thanks
loved
13 years 8 months ago
Where ru my friend
Stan ....
Lost in the wilderness of time
you can't be o man
you are the Stan
who always did stand
loved
13 years 8 months ago
relieved
thanks Rosy
have a great day
and also to stan convey
Race_9togo
13 years 8 months ago
wondered
where Stan had gotten to. Good to hear he's OK.
loved
13 years 8 months ago
Thanks
I am grateful