Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

lou
lou
This poem is part of the workshop:

Splash Pool (initial workshop)

(Read More...)

Lights - splash pool poem posted on behalf of Geezer

Multi-colored streaking lights, wash across my windshield's night
Wiper shadows swishing past, keeping pace with raindrops fast
The motor purrs, and tires shussssh, through icy puddles... slush
Gosh, I guess that Autumn's come, a little cooler, dwindling sun

Geese in their high flying vees, and bright colors in the trees
Squirrels frantic in their gathering, different birds begin to sing
I see the signs of Summer's end, I feel that I have lost a friend
Oh well, it's time to go, the shitty weather tells me so

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: West London, GBR

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda , Jack Kerouac, Alan Ginsberg, D.H Lawrence, Jim Morrison's lyrics,

More from this author

Comments

S

scribbler

13 years 9 months ago

Hi Geeze

Have you tried this in rhyming couplets of 4 line stanzas?............stan

Geezer

Geezer

13 years 9 months ago

Yeah...

and it's still wishy-washy. LOL ~ Gee

lou

lou

13 years 9 months ago

Gee

I thought this poem was part of the splash pool workshop ?

Lou

S

scribbler

13 years 9 months ago

hi Geez

Don't post your rewrite until other shop members give their alternative rewrites. You might get some good ideas from them, that's what this shop is for............stan

Geezer

Geezer

13 years 9 months ago

Yes Lou...

it is. I just forgot to post it correctly. I'm sorry.
Let me know when to post the re-write. ~ Gee