xena465

Mar 05, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Unearthly Encounter

I saw myself like looking in a mirror,

uncanny, how real was my vision.

staring at my body on the ceiling

a gaping hole revealed an incision.

A splash of light shone on me,

I was summoned towards the crack.

Rising, feeling a warm sense of peace;

but something was pulling me back.

Struggling, a force so compelling;

an energy felt, but couldn’t see.

Arms outstretched I levitated,

nothing could set me free.

Suspended in time and space,

I was surrounded by a consoling shape.

It embraced me like a new born baby,

so why did I want to escape?

Present was a darker force,

black and haunting, it pulled at me.

Between two forces, powerless,

I battled with unholy energy.

Suddenly without warning,

I was back in my body on the bed

Doctors prodded and shook me.

`Welcome back`, was all they said.

Was it a battle between God and the Devil?

Was it a tug-of-war to win my soul?

Was I held between living and dying?

Was it anything significant at all?

— xena465, Mar 05, 2010

About the Author

Country/Region: GBR

Critiques

judyanne

16 years 3 months ago

Awesome, Rosina.Just a

Awesome, Rosina. Just a couple 'it felt like my skin was being ripped from me' ?too long, would you prefer 'felt my skin being ripped from me.' and 'from energy I could feel, but couldn’t see.' maybe 'from energy I could feel but not see' ?? OOB, near death, you've got it - just need to get over that hump of ingrained rationality this scientific based ideology that is our 'reality' breeds into us. xxx. lahasax judy

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Hi Judy.Because of my style

Hi Judy. Because of my style of poetry if I take out the words in these lines the grammar of these lines come up as a fragment, as it's not free style. The only way to avoid this is to change the lines. Any suggestions? Rosina xena465

judyanne

16 years 3 months ago

‘I struggled with a force

'I struggled with a force so compelling. It felt like my skin was being ripped from me.' Try ‘that wanted to rip the skin from me’? I think my earlier second suggestion still fits with you style. But we both know i'm no expert. They're just suggestions Rosina from how I feel when I'm reading it. It is your work, and beautiful as it is. lol Judy

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Ive re-posted it…What do

Ive re-posted it...What do you think now? Rosina xena465

judyanne

16 years 3 months ago

**********Awesome

********** Awesome and some. lol Judy I just noticed the 'I tried to brake free' and wondered if you meant 'brake' or 'break'. I actually like the first - an excellent play on words.

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

That wasn’t meant. It was

That wasn't meant. It was a mistake, but I suppose I could leave it as brake. I think that works too in a funny sort of way, like you said. Rosina xena465

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

beautifully done Rosina …

beautifully done Rosina ... I see Judy has already pointed out a couple of spots to you thanks for sharing this near death poem love and hugs Jayne-Chloe

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks Jayne, as always much

Thanks Jayne, as always much appreciated from you. Rosina xena465

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks Troy. I just hope

Thanks Troy. I just hope when my time comes that I won't be dragged towards the dark force that was present in this poem. Rosina xena465

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

I pray the dark force never draws you in

Xena you are a beacon of love and hope girl so keep that alive inside. I also seen the break re:brake and noticed Judy allready tweaked this one up for you. It is a strong poem and a vivid imagery of how you felt. Know that we at Neo family love you lots and glad you are here. Love in Friendship Always Magics02 Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

I know this and I love my

I know this and I love my neo family too. Thanks for great comment. Rosina xena465

mand

16 years 3 months ago

Another excellent poem

Another excellent poem Xena465. Loved it!

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks so much Mand…means

Thanks so much Mand...means a lot to me. Rosina xena465

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

Hello Rosina

Very interesting pen, is this from a personal experience, if I may ask? I had a NDE when I was sixteen, I was clinically dead for four minutes, during a surgical procedure. Unlike your, I had no experience with anything "evil" or the Devil" since I have no belief of such a thing. There was only darkness then light, with messages from the ancestors that I was to return to the physical realms to complete my mission. I have read a lot of NDE, I find it interesting how they very from each other. Great pen you have here, it flows well and again carries the reader along for the experience. Thank you for sharing a most interesting topic. Love and Light to you dear lady, Venus xxxx

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Fortunately it’s

Fortunately it's fictional, but I do have many Out Of Body experiences and have done since I was very little. I have a poem posted called `Out Of Body` about visiting my mother and family back in the 1970's which is true. It was a wonderful experience and I've gone back there many times through the years. It may interest you as you are spiritual. I'm not sure if Out Of Body phenomena is something you believe in, but I do, as I've experienced so many wonderful journey's this way. Rosina xena465

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

Out Of Body

Out Of Body sounds interesting,Rosina, I will have to read it. I definitely believe in OBE/Astral traveling, as I do it all the time, but most likely for different reasons than you do, but what ever reason, it's awesome and regenerates the body and soul. Hugs, Venus xxx

judyanne

16 years 3 months ago

evil

so so true anna, it is only there if you believe it is. we make our own reality. well said. lol

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

Amen to that Judy

Amen to that Judy **Smiles** Well said indeed **Wink**

Candlewitch

16 years 3 months ago

Dear Rosina

I don't believe in a devil, but I know there is plenty of evil in the world. I've had a near death experience when I was twenty-four and had a major hysterectomy. I've had out of body experiences since I was a girl of fourteen. One of my out of body experiences was much like you described. I was in the morning just as I was waking up. I also love my dreams of flying with just my body. I really like this poem. Always, Cat

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

I love my Out Of Body

I love my Out Of Body dreams. I hadn't had one for years, but when I posted my poem a few weeks ago, I had one that night. It was wonderful. I was swimming among tropical fish in the sea. I can't swim so this was why it was so special. Thanks Cat for your most welcomed comment...hope all is well with you. Rosina xena465

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

Rosina

Rosina, your a pisces and can't swim, Wow! That was a good EOB for you then, swimming with the fish :-)

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

I know…Thanks…Can you

I know...Thanks...Can you imagine it? It was a great feeling just swimming so easily... under water too, not just swimming! Rosina xena465

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

Hey Glenda

I read about your dreams of flying. I used to dream that all the time, and it has been awhile since I have had any of those dreams, what a feeling it was, flying all over the top of the house, the villages just a free flowing feeling nothing like I ever experienced here on earth. Hmmm made me think about your comment here, must go get the dream book out and look that one up. Hope you have a wonderful weekend love magics02

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

I would be happy to stay in

I would be happy to stay in this state forever. It makes me wish that death was like that...Just floating along and going anywhere your hearts desire forever and ever. Rosina xena465

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

I have no belief in the Devil

I have no belief in the Devil whats so ever, that would be a Christian based concept, which is not my religion. However, evil as I perceive it to be, I wouldn't call evil at all, only sociopath's and psychopaths committing atrocities against humanity, but is this evil or mentally unbalanced people that for the most part have no control over their behavior, so as a society we have to control it for them? I guess it's up to each individual to decide what evil means to them. I love your kitty, Cat, what a little beauty. I lost my kitty last Valentines Day after having her 19 years. :-(

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

Venus who talking about the devil again??

Hello Indian friend and How are you today. I did not know if this comment was for me or the writer lol. however you are so right about sociopaths and psychopaths committing atrocities against humanity and just how many years has that been going on. It seems in today's society it has gotten alot worse. All you have to do is turn on the tv or read the paper, killings, slaughter, evilness all around us. What happens when these so called criminals go to jail eventually they get out on good time and committ more horrendous acts of violence and then we tax payers foot the bill. The jails are just too overcrowded anymore. Some learn their lessons, and some still don't. These are the ones who really need a professional to intervene and sometimes that does not always work either. Just keep the dreamcatcher above your bed. lol Have a great weekend and hope all is well by your neck of the woods. love, magics02 xoxoxoxo Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

Hello Sweet Mona

Hello Sweet Mona **Smiles** It's really not for anyone inparticular, just me thinking outloud again..lol Unfortunatley, there is nothing you can do about a sociopath, they were born that way and they should be locked up to never see the light of day again, or even put out of their misery, if their crime was bad enough. I was just looking at my dream catcher and thinking in needs dusting....lol All is good here, I just wish it would get warm again, wanted to go to the Strawberry Festival today, but to cold for me, maybe next week, How about you guys? did they catch that monkey yet?...lol You have a GREAT weekend Love and hugs, Venus xoxoxoxoxo

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Hello magics…I don’t

Hello magics...I don't mind my friends have a wee discussion about my theme or similar experiences. It helps me with more insight as to how people are feeling. Rosina xena465

Mariposa

16 years 3 months ago

Wow!

Your poem was gripping and chilling- i couldn't stop reading. It's impressive how you manage to get so much across in your poems while adhering to the structure of rhyming and cadence. Beautiful read. Namaste Jhena Mariposa

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thank you Mariposa. I must

Thank you Mariposa. I must admit it is difficult to right poetry in this way because of the rhynming, but as I can't write free verse it just means I have to work hard, with the aid of friends helping me when it doesn't sound right. When I'm happy with the end result then it's worth it. Rosina xena465

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

My mother had a near death

My mother had a near death experience when she gave birth to my sis and she described it very similar to you, she isnt religious but was drawn to a warm bright light she said that, she recognised that poeple were energies in the place and not human form. she said that her dead grandad pushed her back nad told her she wasnt ready and also that she had seen the docs trying to revive her. another great poem told in a good storie like way and getting the conversations going again! well done rosina, vix Optimism in adversity nutures positive outcomes

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

This experience is a common

This experience is a common occurence and can be frightening or enlightening, depending on what's pulling at you eh! Thanks again. You really have been catching up on my poetry...Your a great friend. Rosina xena465

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks Rosina,as i said the

Thanks Rosina, as i said the pleasure has all been mine, dont feel you have to write strait away if i mass comment again lol, sometimes i dont have time to read any work then i get a heap of it to catch up. have loved doing just that today vix : ) xx Optimism in adversity nutures positive outcomes

themoonman

16 years 3 months ago

Hi Rosina...

I wanted to thank you for the content of this poem, it has a global appeal, one that many are more than ready to hear about. I felt that some of the rhyming was forced, at least for me. In your first line, I'd remove "like", it detracts from the sentence (at least for me). There were also words that could be omitted, some "that's" and "I's"... just a suggestion. The word "gaseous", didn't feel like the best choice where it's used, to me the word indicates a misty shape but a smell too and for that it didn't feel right to me. I hope you don't mind my look, to me this poem has great potential... Richard

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks Richard I’ll go

Thanks Richard I'll go back and make the changes. I appreciate your help. Rosina xena465

pamela

16 years 3 months ago

I liked this poem, and I

I liked this poem, and I enjoyed the conversation it sparked. Keep up the good work! P.

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks Pamela. I’ve

Thanks Pamela. I've tweeked this one a bit, but still to re-post it. Rosina xena465

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