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Jan 15, 2023
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6
How long have I known you
I feel you in my bones,
always right behind me
I know it, I just can't see
You,
and you are so wonderful and loving
soft kisses on worn out skin
I look,into your eyes
as pure as freshly planted rye
you really love me,
don't you?
In every touch,
am I too much?
not enough?
you alway smile, reassuring
oh, and how
curing it is
your love is felt
My only wish is to melt into
You
what, I wonder, have I ever done to deserve this?
a lottery must have been won
I probably cheated, if that's the case
I haven't the right to see your face
I love you.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 5 months ago
The deep emotions that you
The deep emotions that you are capable of show here. I have no suggestions of how you can make this better. ~ Geezer.
.
M4GG0TM3NT4L
2 years 5 months ago
thank you so much!!
thank you so much!!
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 5 months ago
I agree with Geezer
One small thing
“a lottery must of been won”
Should be
“a lottery must have been won”
Or
“a lottery must’ve been won” if you want to keep it phonetically the same.
Otherwise really superb,
Tim
M4GG0TM3NT4L
2 years 5 months ago
noted!!
thanks for the advice :)
Candlewitch
2 years 5 months ago
hello,
I think this is a lovely affirmation of the love you feel!
*hugs, Cat
M4GG0TM3NT4L
2 years 5 months ago
Thank you!!!
Thank you!!!