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Dec 25, 2021
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Absence
Love isn't a burden
until it is gone
A failure of stone
I thought was forever
About This Poem
Review Request Direction: How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Triskelion
3 years 6 months ago
Hi Michael Anthony
It's probably just me, but I get the first two lines and the third just escapes my reasoning. Was it meant to do that?
Thomas
Michael Anthony
3 years 6 months ago
Thanks for stopping by Tri.
Thanks for stopping by Tri. The third line was intended to convey that we often take our loved ones (or lost loves...) for granted, and that they will always be there for us.
Cheers
Michael Anthony
3 years 6 months ago
Also, a lot of my poetry is
Also, a lot of my poetry is inspired by the brevity of haiku, sometimes this works to the poem's advantage, and sometimes I may miss the mark. Merry Christmas!
Cheers
Triskelion
3 years 6 months ago
Aah, I see
I was trying to apply weight measure to the word "stone". Cheers, and Merry Christmas to you as well.
Thomas
Geezer
3 years 6 months ago
I got it...
right away! Good stuff! ~ Geez.
.
scribbler
3 years 6 months ago
hello
Brevity often requires the reader to think.......thanks for the headache lmao
Jackweb
3 years 6 months ago
Line three is the heaviest
It uncovers the heavy Metaphor in the poem. The impact of metaphor is to represent ideas through comparison. It allows poets to convey vivid imagery that transcends literary meanings , creates images that are easier to understand and respond to than literal language.
Simple verse but needs a poetic mind to break it apart.
Well written Michael Anthony