Abstract Personification

Let's dwell in the mystic land,
where birds and humans,
fly hand in hand
across the vast sojourns,
of deserted life.

Sand dunes welcome,
like moving mountains
to move the inner soul,
which resides in some,
to console a piece of one’s mind,
across, beyond the reach of infinity,
yet unfathomed,
that leaves one and all aghast,
from where across the horizon,
an insignificant post was cast,
From a mind as rife, as rife can be,
across the imaginations of past reverie
and future surfs,
that one still needs to traverse.
From heaven to earth,
life exists for sure,
but then you say heaven,
of which none knows
No less, nor more…
Our earth is incredible,
of that you all are sure,
but who says
one can't dwell in a dream?

For ever these insights play a role.
We insignificant heart throbs
of the insane world,
charm humanity as a whole,
With our vociferous voice unchallenged.
Oh! My when will this discourse end
Albeit,
one could seed and sow,
life from year to year
eventually it does grow.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: ROU

Comments

Ian.T

13 years 5 months ago

Loved

I think that this is without question the best I have read of yours for a while, you seemed to have cast off the web you became attached to and flown free, just the first line still held your form but the piece rolled on into another world where you seemed happy to dwell and relate to us the things you see, Great, Yours Ian.T

loved

13 years 5 months ago

Hello Ian, thanks a million

Do you know Shirley ,,,she dropped in... what a surprise
really she is a great lady and poet.
thanks for the deviation i made
as you intended .
thanKs frnd
ur ung bard

Esker

13 years 5 months ago

just read through

love your word use and abstract
art of positioning words
Love the word
Vociferous
too dazzled at moment

thank You

loved

13 years 5 months ago

Let the words dazzle and

let all be bedazelled,
thanks for your kind visit
I am indeed honored ....Esker

wesley snow

13 years 5 months ago

Yep, one of your best.

I still have a couple of negative thoughts though (when do I not?).
First off, I would have you make up your mind as to whether or not you are going to capitalize the first letter of each line. I would prefer you did not as I think the practice is an ugly archaism, but this is the poet's decision. You capitalized every line save one, so I'll assume it is nothing more than a typo.
Next, you need to rethink how you use the word "rife". Rife is an adjective and must describe a noun. Nothing can be "rife". It must be rife with something. "The man is rife with injury." "The government is rife with corruption." Did that make sense?
It's still one of your best poems.
wesley

loved

13 years 5 months ago

Perhaps

a mind as
rife* as

*abundant, plentiful, or numerous...

may justify the deviation ... friend WS

About capitalization....
this idiotic Internet spell- gram check insists
glad you goad me to over rule the dictates ...
I am undoing the capitals now

loved

13 years 5 months ago

Thanks friend

i am in a mix up state in some certain affairs,
I shall revert,
as poetry is being shelved for a while
OWING TO LACK OF TIME