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The Accidental Contestant
My reply may quick; betray
but, it is yours that morphs to grey;
I'm beside myself, and not from any lice !
I loathe to be me, is what's true
so, the only thing that I can do;
is pick two seats, and calmly sit down twice.
~
A plethoric myriad of thoughts
escapes my brain like small robots
coercing all pedestrians to pause;
good thing for them, the lights glowed, red
for over half, changed their minds, instead;
that break alone saved barrels full of gauze !
~
The orb is slick with indigo
before sunlight, we'll have to go.
or, run the risk of stalling at the gate;
our own dimension will emphatically
highlight all our integrity;
be mindful as you fill your dinner plate !
~
Obstreperously, we're weighed at birth
our job's to live up to our worth,
bow down to me, if you don't know the rules !
Decidedly, they are not fair,
for each one broken, you gain a pair;
overdo things, and they'll seat you with the fools !
~
About This Poem
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Frenchf
12 years 4 months ago
Interesting write
But what were you referring to?
docmaverick
12 years 4 months ago
I really dunno....
...mr. fry. I guess it's towards some oddity of life. Without more details, we may never unearth the origin.
doc.
BlueDemon77
12 years 4 months ago
It struck me as a statement of state supported classicism
You know, be born without much money in a small town or inner city, work menial jobs all your life, smoke, drink then conveniently die at 65.
Good work
Ron
docmaverick
12 years 4 months ago
yep, sir demon....
...that's exactly how us classic gangsters do it !
:) doc.
Ian.T
12 years 4 months ago
Beep What's up Doc
Let confusion reign, there in the words are hidden thoughts that even to your eyes bring a question, later can you do a little edit to add some reason for this ramble.
I sometimes write something along this type, but then put to the notepad and edit until reason grants me an audience.
I shall await it's return lol with delicate notes of a format of reason, Yours Ian.T
docmaverick
12 years 4 months ago
Ah, sir ian....
...I believe i grasp very well of what you speak.
Thanx, for the read, and repast;
doc.