Acquiring your diploma...

(in regard to the youngest
of our deux daughters,
who as an infant diagnosed
with development delay,
and blessed with needs based
supportive services so
academic accomplishment
warrants a commendable
accolade of praise,
no matter she matriculated
and graduated after
about a half dozen years
amassing the necessary credits)
from the Community College
of Bend, Oregon
a reason to celebrate,
which Associate's Degree
best framed and mounted
so all can see and marvel
at the mental effort
invested in completing
necessary credits earning kudos
from me - the papa,
who will try to express his reaction
with understandable words
aware difficulty to comprehend me,
who ofttimes forgets not everybody
feels as strongly interested 
in the English language
as this self declared bard arse
congratulating you attaining
an academic milestone
in much less time than I,
who completed Applied Science
within no less
than a quarter century
after hopscotching from
one college/university
to quite few others
such as Temple University,
Antioch College, and Kutztown State
not counting the CETA program
(The Comprehensive Employment
and Training Act (CETA)
a 1973 U.S. federal law, signed
by President Nixon,
that created decentralized,
federally funded job training
and public service jobs
for the unemployed
and economically disadvantaged
replacing earlier manpower programs,
offering 12–24 months
of work in public agencies and nonprofits,
and replaced by
the Job Training
Partnership Act in 1982)
at (then) Maxwell Institute
and an early twenty seventh birthday
(videlicet twelfth night from now).
Unlike our youngest of two
female progeny, the birth father
struggled academically horrifically
linkedin with congenital malady
compromising healthy development
allowing, enabling and providing
the figurative stage
for complete healthy metamorphosis
from child to adult
resulting in squandered opportunities
as highlighted in the following poem.

Incomplete metamorphosis of distilled adolescent...
therefore he characterizes himself
as an anomaly...any idea why?

Mortified, petrified, stultified, et cetera sheltered,
and mortally wounded prepubescent,
I consider myself
analogously buttressed, cocooned,
garrisoned (for bing
analogous to a keeler),
hardened, insulated,
where cell baited jumping frog
o' Montgomery County ne'er
went leaving larvae stage,
now no divine providential
power can assuage,
yours truly metaphorically locked
within invisible iron bound cage
every occasion to shower
validates steep wage
permanently doled out,
yet tis futile to rage
against this human machine
i.e. body dielectric rampage
clocking three scored
orbitz chronological gauge
forever fixed feigned fodder,
when un-lived uber story
of mein kampf writ faint
chicken scratch final page
gin hated anorexic
regressive toddling cribbage
deadly game of mine Life pampered
post infancy attended
Aladdin (a lad in) his hermitage
late childhood marriage
with grim reaper as
coefficient co-inhabitant
feasting emaciated lovely bones
verily scrawny, puny, and
nerdy, yea easy to lyft
courtesy lost livingsocial scrimmage
trademark spindleshanks -
stagnant embarrassingly useless
two legged equipage
at childhood's end...,
me skinny package then
weighing, eh no
more'n half dozen stone,
these days when
undressing to wash
forced to espy physical
Homo sapiens wreckage
constant visual reminder
this spare rankled, stunted,
tendered ship of state,
yours truly nah oh sage
enlightenment gleaned i.e.
20/20 hindsight kickstarted
quickened, leveraged, mortgaged...,
principally unbalanced worthiness
anatomical disparity
impossible mission to salvage
accounting rent permanently askew
fixed APR rendered
amortization sabotage
irreversible penalty suffrage
escaping serfdom volunteering
self as webbed vassalage
til death do me part.

Subsequently, his female
persona pacified, but Willy
Wonka who could offer
the golden ticket
to the chocolate factory
(and provide restitution
to mine childhood,
whereat I could select
the road not taken
setting me on a course
to healthy maturation
of body, mind, and spirit)
honest to dog housed
somewhere in Philly
within himself aptly,
coed gently, optimally,
suitably, verily, wonderfully
called Anna Milly,
which readership reception
might surprisingly please Billy
me not intended tubby
icy cold nor chilly...

After chugging, guzzling,
sipping, quaffing... wine
bitter to this teetotaling
(pharmacological medication dependent)
tongue as quinine
undoubtedly equally unpalatable
getting pricked with rusty nine
inch nails, (thank you
Trent Reznor) analogous
to being crucified
(been there done that)
inebriated self actualization
regarding mine
mental clarity crossed
figurative thin blue line
abnormality dawned
inside fifty shades
of gray matter marinated
these long years in brine,
which realization bubbled,
fizzled, nudged, plastered,
eventually spurred
bile lent reflux
in short shrift
generating poem without
rhyme, reason, but
essentially drivel concocted
blimey verse unarguably asinine.

Just bear with me and
swallow this poetic bunk,
no matter (ah mint) absolute
zero vodka drunk,
nor other alcoholic beverage
(amber liquid of
the dog gods) downed,
despite feeling in
deep purple funk
cuz that would wreak havoc
courtesy grapes of
wrath fermented gunk
very little liquor necessary
to plaster laughingstock
(sand thrown in these myopic eyes)
by any best buy, garden variety,
home depot hunk
treating me like
unwanted, outdated, and housed
née cooped (with toys in the attic) junk
enshrouded himself covered
with dust evokes monk.

Quickly, mostly easily forgotten about
elapse of time
regarding, weekday, month, year...
and purposeless either
to twist or shout
cuz pervasive fishy developmental
gill tee subservience deeply
affected him while
trout fishing in America.