Is this all a Game

What if this is all fake,
all a game being played,
every decision made,
using a game plan,
every twinkle in your eye a facade,
every kiss the same as every other,
every unread message,
the result of lost interest,
I ask is this all real,
will the feelings prevail,
what if this is all the same,
all a game still being played,
soon you will realise games can only be played for so long

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Region, Country: FL, USA

Comments

heartfelt4262

5 years 10 months ago

This is my first poem

This is my first poem I have ever shared with someone other than my sister.

Eumolpus

5 years 10 months ago

easy flow

I would suggest a few thinks in the last part

I ask "is this all real,
will the feelings prevail,
what if this is all the same,
all a game still being played?"

Soon you will come to realize
games can only be played

for so long.

I added a question mark, and it feels like a quote. I made the second a new stanza, like a new paragraph,,, to breaks the line, slowing it down, which will yield the most effect for the finish that expands with a kinda poetic truth. So the imagination tries to absorb a somewhat abstract concept...life, a game, etc. I changed it to "soon you will come to realize" , it felt softer than "you will realize" My take.

Share your work! That's why writers write.

Geezer

5 years 10 months ago

I got...

your message and it says to me; you wonder if the love professed, the feelings are real? Eumolpus is right, share your work and really look at the critique. Think about what you're saying. Read as many poets as you have time for, it will help you to understand the words and how they are placed for the most effect. ~ Geezer.
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