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All The Seasons
Spring flowers titer and grow in the comforting lukewarm air
Dogs run and roll in the grass their owners watching with care
Smells from the plants blow through the winds that gently play with your hair
Children laugh and run through the fields heads filled with stories to share
The air turns humid and starts to get hot as the flowers slowly die away
Cute little children at small yellow stands yell out "Fresh Lemonade!"
Light fuzzy sweaters turn into tank tops as the season changes each day
People run wild roaming the beach shouting out "Hip Hip Hooray!"
A fierce and strong wind blows leaves off trees turning them rouge and gold
Tank tops change into heavy fur coats covering bodies shaking with cold
"Cover your ears and always wear mittens!" small giggling children are told
There's always one in a t-shirt and shorts thinking he's courageous and bold
Big Jolly Santas fill department stores, smelling of peppermint and nutmeg
Little old ladies browse the toy aisles filled with children beginning to beg
Stocking are washed then put out to dry and hung on a small metal peg
On Christmas eve not a soul is awake as Santa puts down one leg
And soon before you have even noticed its chilly spring again
The seasons will change one by one before you can count to ten
You'll look back at the old picture books remembering the places you've been
The seasons will start and continue each year over and over again
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
lovedly
4 years 7 months ago
The seasons will start and continue each year over and over agai
The seasons will continue each year
over and over again
This is too fat a poem
bulky like me
only one line would do
last one I've quoted
for VIVI you
Viviana Smith
4 years 6 months ago
what exercise should I put it
what exercise should I put it through to thin it up