Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Beggars retreat!

Where are you going,
from whence do you hail?
Your city streets boarded up,
to piss in no pail.
Your name like a marker
a cemetery stone.
No kindred spirit
to throw you a bone!
You languish on Saturday
no place to call home.
Down by the viaduct
you're wanting to roam.
You can't find an exit.
Your best bet a gun,
but you just keep on holding out
there in the sun.
The heat it is scorching
got you on the run.
You'll make it to Sunday
might find a new home!
You just keep on hopeing
that you won't come undone!
The city streets empty,
they find you alone!

About This Poem

Last Few Words: A poem for the homeless!

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Ogden, Utah, USA

Favorite Poets: Jon Anderson, Jon Ondrasik, Donald Fagen, Sting, Eric Bloom , and all of the poets at neo.

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

Lavender

Lavender

7 months ago

Beggars' Retreat

Hello, John,
Very raw. Helps convey understanding, empathy, and compassion.
Thank you,
L

Leslie

Leslie

7 months ago

L

I love poems like this they tell a sad story, but in the end, if you see things as I do we're all going home!

Leslie

Leslie

6 months 3 weeks ago

Beggars retreat!

This is a great compliment coming from you. I truly appreciate your freindship!

Ruby Lord

Ruby Lord

6 months 3 weeks ago

Beggars' Retreat

Your poem clearly conveys the isolation of the character using raw emotion. The ending is left open to interpretation, which I find satisfying in a poem. Well done, Ruby :) xxx

Leslie

Leslie

6 months 3 weeks ago

Ruby

Thank you for your comment. I don't have much to say, but do appreciate your freindship and your willingness to critique my poem.