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Feb 13, 2025
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Blocked
Angry
Frustrated
Disappointed
and unable to move forward.
I want to complete this.
I want to get this done.
It starts.
It stops.
It moves foraward
and back.
Then
it ceases.
I am used
to getting things done
in the right way,
in a timely fashion
and it is not happening.
I am obstructed
due to lack of knowledge,
and a new challenge
presented to me.
My thoughts are overflowing
with emotion.
I need to get this done.
I must get this done.
Option B
is forming in my mind.
One to one.
In the real world.
Tha is how I will get it done.
I'll take a break
and cogitate.
I will make a choice
which works.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I had a bad day with a computer program which simply did not cooperate with me. I really need to complete something, and it not happening. Worse still, it is taking place remotely, which is second best in my opinion.
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
neopoet
4 months 4 weeks ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
Your poem effectively conveys a sense of frustration and determination in the face of obstacles. The repetition of phrases like "I want to get this done" and "It starts. It stops." creates a feeling of being stuck in a cycle of progress and setbacks. The use of short, direct sentences enhances the urgency and emotion in the poem.
Consider exploring more vivid imagery or specific details to further engage the reader and paint a clearer picture of the challenges faced. Additionally, you may want to experiment with varying the rhythm or structure of the poem to add depth and complexity to your message. Overall, your poem captures a relatable experience of feeling blocked and seeking a way forward.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
One
4 months 4 weeks ago
Hi there,
Hi there,
your poem captures a powerful emotional experience, frustration, self-doubt, with a sense of being blocked by something unknown or new. It’s raw, edgy & relatable, especially when dealing with tasks that feel important but seem impossible to complete.
The repetition of phrases like "I need to get this done" & "I want to complete this" emphasizes the urgency & pressure you feel. The rhythm of the poem, with its abrupt stops & starts (mirroring the subject matter), gives a sense of the emotional turmoil, further strengthening the poem’s authenticity.
I was engrossed in this piece from beginning to end & after the third read I'd found more that I'd missed on earlier reads.
regards
One
The Gogetter
4 months 4 weeks ago
Thank you or the comments One
I am feeling all those things, and all due to the lack of completion of a computer program to produce an ebullletin. I was sitting in the car on the way to going somewhere for a wonderful cultural music experience ,and this is all that I could think of. I wrote this poem in the car waiting for the doors of the venue to open. It is small stuff really, and I should not react in this way, but I want to learn this, and I feel as if I am being locked out of it. My daughter says that she has the same genetic problem , in other words, she inherited it from me. She is trying to encourage me, telling me that I will get it in the end.