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Sep 22, 2022
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Into Blue
Something new, unheard yet
Blooming from into Blue
Shaping a flow, body with ease
A rhythmic exchange, perfectly simplistic
The transparent cord between
Fusing the harmonies into one
Raspy sweetness to the ears
Becoming with the own
About This Poem
Last Few Words: This is a poem I just wrote while listening to Maya Hawke's new album and felt really peaceful and relaxed. I hope you enjoy! -Bri :)
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 9 months ago
Not knowing...
anything about Maya Hawkes; I had to go look her up and listen to her work. I can see why you would feel peaceful and relaxed in listening to her music. I was a little bit confused with the last line, until I had the thought, becoming with the own?
What does that mean? I then had a revelation; I think that it has a double meaning. It means to have a kinship with the artist herself and owning the idea, the message. At any rate, a well-done piece of work. ~ Geezer.
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