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Oct 22, 2022
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This poem is part of the contest:
Neopoem Of The Week October 16th to October 22 2022
Burn Out
See the stars burn out
Falling swiftly to the ground
Gone without a trace
A Senryu
© an hour ago, Eugenia
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 9 months ago
Love it
Love, love, love it.
Tim
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 9 months ago
Love it
Love, love, love it.
Tim
Lavender
2 years 9 months ago
Burn Out
Greetings, Gigi!
With first read, I considered this more of a haiku representing nature, but it cleverly may be interpreted as a senryu as we humans experience burn out much like the stars. Either way, it is beautiful!
Thank you!
Welcome to Neo!
Lavender
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 9 months ago
Yes Lav
Exactly. It’s both, depending on what level you’re reading! Isn’t it great?!
Tim
RoseBlack
2 years 9 months ago
Wonderful
I was thinking along the lines of Lavender...as we experience burn out much like the stars. Such a simple, elegant write. Great job!