Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Colours
Green is the colour
Of the deep dark sea
Blue is the feeling
Deep within me
Red is the colour
Of the red sky at night
Yellow is the colour
Of the sun so bright
Black is the colour
Of a cave, deep and dark
Brown is the colour
Of an old trees bark
Grey is the colour
Of the socks I have on
One day these colours
In my heart will belong
Ha! Ha! Ha!
They're laughing at me
So I'll keep on thinking
Of trying to be free
Two, three, four
They're locking my door
Six, seven, eight
It's not even late
I wish I was a sparrow
Into the sun I'd fly
I wish I was a kookaburra,
whose laugh is strong but shy
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Thank you for reading. :)
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Comments
neopoet
1 year 2 months ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
It is not feasible to offer feedback.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Lavender
1 year 2 months ago
Colours
Hello, Carrie,
So much here...the simplicity of this adds to its deep meaning. I especially like the references to laughing, and the kookaburra. Such a lonely feeling over all. I'll be back to read again!
Thank you!
L
Carrie
1 year 1 month ago
Hi Lavender
Glad you're enjoying. Thank you. :)