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Sep 13, 2022
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Cow
Cow
There is a cow up ahead on the road carrying a heavy load
Please give her a hand; she is trying to reach the promised land
She wants to take her milk to the honey, where it is always sunny
She cannot do it by herself, and you are the only one left
To help carry her load on down that long, long road
If her load you will help bear when you finally get there
They will let you come inside; you will not be denied
About This Poem
Last Few Words: These words just came to me
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 10 months ago
My only...
criticism here, is that cows are usually the female definitive of an animal, yet you refer to it as being a male. If it is male, it does not give milk. If indeed, it is a female cow, you should change the language to read as [her]. ~Geezer.
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Depressed 1
2 years 10 months ago
Thanks
Thanks Geezer
Obadiah Grey
2 years 10 months ago
If you're milking a male cow
If you're milking a male cow
I'd hazard a guess it has a big grin
and a far away look in his eye.
Easily fixable mistake, the sentiment behind your piece is laudable
and worth the effort!
Obi.
Triskelion
2 years 10 months ago
Crikey!
That's a cow of a different....gender?
Jackweb
2 years 10 months ago
The cow here..
I think, that's a metaphorical word.
.
RoseBlack
2 years 10 months ago
I interpreted the Cow
to represent our fellow human. If we see someone carrying a heavy load (physical or emotional), stop and lend a hand. We never know what someone else is going through and a shoulder to lean on or a set of helping hands may be much needed and appreciated. Good write.
.
Depressed 1
2 years 10 months ago
Thanks
Thanks Rose. That is exactly right.
scribbler
2 years 10 months ago
Hi
I agree with Rose plus I liked the internal rhyme
Depressed 1
2 years 10 months ago
Thanks
Thanks Scribbler