A Crescendo of Observation

Betrayal endured
Wrath engendered
Rage resides
Where love is ended

The line is drawn
The plot extended
Once eternal lovers
No longer foes befriended.

BjR 6 March, '11

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Region, Country: Tip of Southern Africa, ZAF

Favorite Poets: Too many to narrow down, but briefly :, AUDEN, T.S. ELIOT, DICKENSON, RILKE, THOREAU, RUMI ... the list is endless. Am inspired by many, especially those that live lives of "quiet desperation, and go to the grave with a song still in them" (THoreau)

Comments

Candlewitch

14 years 4 months ago

Hello Boni!!!

It has been a very long time since I have read your work! It is GREAT to see you!!! I really like these lines:

The line is drawn
The plot extended
Once eternal lovers
No longer foes befriended.

This piece could be about a friendship gone sour, too, if you exchanged a couple of words.

always, Cat

Geezer

14 years 4 months ago

Hey Boni...

Great to see you posting again! I liked this, and your rhyming is very good. The last line line seems a little unwieldy, but overall, very nice work. Maybe you could say: Now foes, we are intended? Or something of that nature. ~ Gee

Bonitaj

14 years 4 months ago

Hi you two!

Feels so comfortable being back - like putting on an ol' pair of shoes!
Yes Gee - I had some difficulty with that last line... in fact I had thought of scrapping the whole second verse - then Cat comes back and says she likes it! ;)
Great to have you "pro's" stop by! I have been doing a lot of academic work around specific "personality defects" and "neurosis" in particular! Plan to post some of the material for interest sake! and it is REALLY insightful!!
Hope to see you soon!
Regards
Boni