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Jan 12, 2025
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Crossing the Bridge
Once you cross the bridge
And walk over to the other side
You can never return.
You know where you've been
It was all darkness
And it will make you unwell
Deep inside.
Over the other side
Is such a better place
A much sunnier place
And you will improve.
You will feel better.
Your healing will begin.
You understand this
So well.
You know instinctively
That healing began
Some time ago
Although you didn't notice it,
It surprised you
That you felt amazing
And that you could smile
Once again.
That's how you knew
That you had crossed the bridge.
The walk over the bridge
Took a long time
But you reached your destination.
That walk was worthwhile.
Each step you took
Was overwhelming and emotional.
It gave you power
The power to be in the moment.
Each moment counts
Every day counts
Everything counts.
You just have to feel it
With all your senses.
This super power
Is the power of resilience
The power of the mind
The power of your strength.
This is the power of your purpose.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I have worked through most of my grief in a long winding path. The good news is that mindfulness has given me a wonderful strategy to deal with it in each of its stages. I genuinely consider that I have come from one side of a bridge and moved to the other. I would like the readers in Neopoet to react to the way I used the language to open up about the process. Have I given you something to deal with ? Did you feel it?
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
neopoet
6 months ago
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Crossing the Bridge" successfully employs metaphor and symbolism to convey a journey of personal growth and healing. The bridge serves as a potent symbol of transition and change, effectively illustrating the protagonist's journey from a place of darkness to one of light and wellness.
However, the poem could benefit from a more nuanced exploration of the protagonist's emotional journey. While the poem does touch upon feelings of surprise and empowerment, it might be more impactful to delve deeper into these emotions. For instance, what specific events or realizations led to the protagonist's surprise? How did the protagonist come to recognize their own resilience?
Additionally, the poem's structure and rhythm could be refined. The lines vary greatly in length, which can disrupt the flow of the poem. Consider revising the poem with a more consistent line length to create a smoother reading experience.
Lastly, the poem's message about the power of resilience and the mind is clear, but it could be made more compelling with the use of more vivid and specific imagery. Rather than stating these powers directly, show them through concrete images or scenes. This could make the poem's message more emotionally resonant and memorable for readers.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact