Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Dance of the princess
Her arms skewed,
She commands the beats
Swaying her hips
Slaying in purple apparel,
Adorned with a touch of rose gold,
Switching of her feet
Pitching her niche
Flowing in
Her masked face,
Such justice to her identity,
We're bewitched by her enchanting,
Adornment speaks flamboyance,
Like the bloom of spring,
Her piercing gaze,
Her jewelry hung like garlands of petals
Such allure such awe.
Here and there,
This way that way,
She sways attentions
and bestirs affections.
It's the dance of a princess,
a royal priestess,
eyeballs oscillate,
Heads follow her lead.
Every move she's curvaceous,
Each step, time is stilled,
Oh, what a dance!
It's show stopping,
And the showboating,
All shades of flaunts and struts,
parts well defined like onion bulbs,
busts firm and shapely are sculptured masterpieces,
Hair craft as a gourd of wine,
face the brightness of a star,
smile, all innocence and grace,
skin clear as sands on the seashore,
this lass rings melodies in my heart.
©Uchenna Ozoekwe
a.k.a Bethany Blaze
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
chevyvent
6 years 11 months ago
Enjoyable read very moving in its stead
Enjoyable read very moving in its stead. Really transformed the audience in this illustartive piece. Very good writing you got here very nicely done you got going on here. Made me think of nature's tranquility the way the last stanza was heading. Really made you think. Thank you for the opportunity in reading.
Mikeozams
6 years 11 months ago
Thanks
I appreciate your comment. You really read it and it blessed your heart. Good KOB.
raj
6 years 11 months ago
the choice of words and
the choice of words and excellent language use have provided the stage to create a pseudo real choreography in terms of optics as well as dynamics...
a pleasure read..
....................................................................
Mikeozams
6 years 11 months ago
Thanks
I appreciate your comment. It comes so close to how I feel about the poem.
weirdelf
6 years 11 months ago
"pseudo real choreography", onya raj!
Couldn't have said it better myself.
I do love your energy and skilful wordplay, Uchenna.
Only one small complaint
Such beauty such awe
There is always a better word than 'beauty' in poetry.
For your listening to some slight metric hitches-
https://vocaroo.com/i/s1ChIRjFEzj7
You can copy and paste that link to your Facebook page if you wish.
Mikeozams
6 years 11 months ago
Thanks
Thanks a lot. What if I use 'allure' or 'comeliness' instead of 'beauty'. What do you think?
weirdelf
6 years 11 months ago
allure
really works with awe
Mikeozams
6 years 11 months ago
Thanks
Correction is noted. I will implement as guided. Thanks Mentor. You're the best.