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Oct 23, 2016
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Daze Maze:
Visionaries deem
That vaunted National Dream
Has run out of steam
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Thanks to Keith Logan's suggestion for the improved reformatted Rhyku.
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Keith Logan
8 years 8 months ago
Try it this way round
Visionaries deem,
seems to have run out of steam,
our national dream.
OriginalRhyku
8 years 8 months ago
Happy Day
Thanks for your valued suggestion - hope that the reformatted version including your suggested first line meets with your approval.
Keith Logan
8 years 8 months ago
I am honoured
that you found something useful within my crit. Not something that happens a lot.
Candlewitch
8 years 8 months ago
hello,
I like your civic-minded poetry. we could all learn a lot from you!
always, Cat
OriginalRhyku
8 years 8 months ago
Cat
You are being gracious in your praise. I learn a lot from reading all of your poetry since all of you have varied life experiences.
My poetry can be deemed to be boring and trite by some people and is based on the views of an armchair philosopher viewing the world not as it is but as it should be according to the armchair philosopher.