Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

deeper

I’d love to expect nothing,
but I take a deep breathe,
I carry on, reading books to
pass the time, on rush of
thoughts buried in my head,
flustered within, I’m torn
apart from reality, now I’m
deep diving into my own world.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36x_JYwLuRY&t=23513s

Review Request Direction: Is the internal logic consistent?
[This option has been removed]

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Too many to name

More from this author

Comments

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 4 months ago

This will...

lead one into a story that begs to be finished. Yes, the internal logic is consistent. One criticism; on wards is supposed to be one word: [onwards]. ~Geezer.
.

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 years 4 months ago

hello,

this work of self discovery is fantastic and begs for more. I would love to see you continue the story!

*hugs, Cat
ever, eddy

*

Tracey Underwood

Tracey Underwood

3 years 4 months ago

Loved it

This is great for feeling the plight of the soul. I would love to see you expand on it and bring it out more. Great job!