Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Mar 20, 2023
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
Elephants (inspired by Aesthetic Night)
Heavy memories
Elephants meandering
Through a grass less plain
Footprints fossilized
Impressions in mud and clay
Artifacts of pain
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Inspired by the way Aesthetic Night’s poem ‘Elephants!’ made me feel.
Style/Type: Structured: Eastern
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Candlewitch
2 years 3 months ago
dear Tim,
I was very interested to see your take on John's Elephants. I am glad that you kept it 'real'
* ever eddy
excellent!
*love & hugs, Cat
RoseBlack
2 years 3 months ago
A great take
on a great poem! Well done!
Jackweb
2 years 3 months ago
So deep!
Concisely written, with great metaphor of Elephant. This suggests something deeper... I think, this has a hidden undertone. Beautiful!
.
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 3 months ago
Thank you
You are correct, there’s something underneath. I appreciate the comment and the read. Thank you.
Tim
Jackweb
2 years 3 months ago
You're welcome
I knew it.
.
Leslie
2 years 3 months ago
Elephants
A moving poem. When you see a young one does it make you smile.
It causes elation to see the care they receive their mothers.
Sometimes I feel a little like crying.