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Dec 19, 2022
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Emotions in Seasons (Difficult Feelings)
Standing alone
Brittle and cold
Like the winter wind
Rattling my bones
You made me think
You made me feel
And now what I thought was right
Doesn't feel right at all
I want to love you
I want to push you away
I want to believe everything you say
I'm afraid you won't stay
Standing alone
Watching the snow
I'm beginning
To not like the cold at all
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Candlewitch
2 years 6 months ago
this poem hit home...
it probably isn't meant as how I took it. I was put in mind of my greatest fear: Abandonment! I have weekly nightmares about being abandoned. wonderfully dark poem!
*ever, eddy
*hugs, Cat
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Hi Cat
Yes- there is an element of abandonment in there. There are many difficult feelings in this poem. When you have been dead inside for so long and start feeling again, it can be overwhelming for so many reasons!
Candlewitch
2 years 6 months ago
dear Carrie,
I can understand that, as I spent about ten years with a locked heart, one night stands, crazy stunts, and letting that cold direct my actions, I was cruel to those who tried... then I met Steven and I knew he was the one who could thaw my frozen heart. it took a lot of energy to be in protection mode for so long. these lines resonate:
I want to love you
I want to push you away
I want to believe everything you say
I'm afraid you won't stay
*truly, Cat
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
I am glad
I am not alone. Thank you for the supportive comments.
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 6 months ago
Yeah that’s the part they don’t tell you
Healing hurts. It’s difficult because it involves pointing the finger at oneself. That’s not “beating oneself up” but an honest assessment of your feelings, why you have them when you have them (identifying triggers), and enacting some strategies to cope in a manor that isn’t self destructive or immobilizing to the ego.
I’m here if you wanna talk,
Tim
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
I may
Take you up on that sometime. Thank you!
Jackweb
2 years 6 months ago
Truly ...
I can pick your emotions one by one from the whole poem. I believe your husband could feel your emotions as well. I understand your feelings in this piece!
.
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Thank you Jack
This was not written for my husband..that ship sailed a long time ago. Glad you could feel the emotions!
Jackweb
2 years 6 months ago
Truly ...
I can pick your emotions one by one from the whole poem. I believe your husband could feel your emotions as well. I understand your feelings in this piece!
.
Rula
2 years 6 months ago
Dear Carrie
Whatever triggered this piece. I hope hard feelings and bad times shall leave by the end of the year and been replaced by healthier relations and better times.
I should say that this is an excellent entry for the contest. The overwhelming mixed feelings, coldness, the brittle bones, wow! How expressive is this piece.
Pls. be safe dear and take care.
And you better win the conrest with this one, just saying;-)
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Hi Rula
Thank you for the high praise. There are so many emotions that went into this piece. I am glad you feel this was a good choice.
Simon
2 years 6 months ago
Nice twisted feelings
Actually I almost panic that there will be a heartbreaking
but thank God that's doesn't happened this is a very nice and cool feeling
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Hi Simon
Thank you for the comment and the read!
Lavender
2 years 6 months ago
Emotions in Season
Hi, there, Carrie,
The use of the word "brittle" moved me the most. It conveys so much emotion. I hope we soon read of stronger, warmer thoughts and feelings in your poetry. Best wishes to you.
L
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Thanks L
There are warm feelings but they are conflicted and overpowered by the other feelings. Maybe I will melt totally over time.
Candlewitch
2 years 6 months ago
dear Carrie,
you are you, and whatever you do, however you do it, you shall remain you. and we love you.
*hugs & love, Cat
*ever, eddy
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Thank you
That means a lot
Abby
2 years 6 months ago
I found this poem enjoyable
I found this poem enjoyable and relatable. Nice work.
RoseBlack
2 years 6 months ago
Hi Abby
Thank you for the read and comment.
RoseBlack
2 years 5 months ago
Thank you
Thank you everyone
Rula
2 years 5 months ago
Congratulations
dear Carrie. Well done dear. Well deserved indeed!
RoseBlack
2 years 5 months ago
Thank you Rula
Your high praise and confidence in this piece means so much!
Lavender
2 years 5 months ago
Congratulations, Carrie,
This is a very moving piece. Very well done.
L
RoseBlack
2 years 5 months ago
Thank you
Glad you enjoyed
Hussainy
2 years 5 months ago
This is really nice I like it
This is really nice I like it
Well done poet
RoseBlack
2 years 5 months ago
Thank you so much
For the comment and the read