Expression of an Impressionist

"Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"

The alarming trend of renegade
souper spoons ladling out propaganda
cast a chilling, galvanizing, and spooking trend
many spoons transitioning to sporks
and running off with knaves of knives.

Why, where, and when all spoons
got uppity and disappeared
mystifies kitchen motley crews
across the webbed wide world
as to why these implements
consisting of a small,
shallow oval or round bowl
on a long handle,
used for eating, stirring, and serving food
vanished right before the eyes of Laura Mars
leaving top notch experts with highly sir-rated
sharp cutlery skills
expressing unanimous befuddlement,
nevertheless, I tried to feign self importance
to cook up my own theory
contributed as an airtight notion
eventually also grudgingly promulgated
by countless service members,
especially those enlisted
in the Coast Guard and/or Navy
as opposed to other branches of the military,
which past generations
of present amphibious veterans
(whose lineage traced
back to early "Frogmen")
sometimes got submerged
in a yellow submarine
and living a life of ease
ten thousand leagues under the sea
of the expansive watery environment
essentially the menfolk
(namely husbands predominantly SEALS
by no Otter name),
and/or their mien ale wives
acclimated where still waters run deep.

Hence aforementioned runaway utensil issue
declared a riddle, wrapped in a mystery,
inside an enigma,
a quote originally used
by Winston Churchill
to describe the Soviet Union
during the second world war)
despite round the clock coverage
of what appears to be a mecca
of veritable lemmings.

As of the crafting of this poem
no dramatic headway
established on the figurative beachhead
meaning near impossible mission to boot
no matter stop the presses decree issued
to squeeze any additional fuller capacity
to allow, enable, and provide
feedback on what I already dished out
while the president at present
discussed and gathered top brass
to engineer emergency war whoop
if necessary bringing back the draft
(compulsory military service) or reinstatement
with intent to amass sizable troop
movement to enable, and provide
up to the nanosecond
details so one may get latest scoop
within the blink of an eye),
whereby the national global effort to recoup
boasting officers future offspring
hinted courtesy embarrassing pictures
of ship shape men fatigued with arm forces
stealthily unbuttoning uniforms of pretty thang
donning heterosexual couples
spooning, kissing, and beaming
pictures at an exhibition adorned
awash with bouncing baby boys and girls
(now grown to men and women)
claimed sons and daughters of their own born
with a silver demitasse in their mouths,
and strongly said utensils believed
they (silverware) hit upon dim minted notion
while cooks shucked corn
that aforementioned flatware
forged courtesy blood, sweat and tears.

Sum melting of
manufactured in Dearborn
home of Ford Motor Company world headquarters
and birthplace of Henry Ford
also boasts a large Arab American population
and cultural attractions
like the Arab American National Museum
diehard first spoon fed their young'uns
initially settled by French Canadians
in the late 18th century,
with Antoine Dequindre
being one of the first known
non-Native American settlers
experienced an identity crisis
suffering debilitating malady
analogous to plight
experienced courtesy the Michigan einhorn
synonymous with staggering
diminution in English speaking peoples.