Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Dec 17, 2024
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
Fear
It may have been the tangled neurons
buzzing about in my head that tripped me,
knocking the wind out of my passable life
as if sending me tumbling
onto concrete,
splattering like a china doll,
pieces of me scattering into pockets of empty spaces
where once a foundation of confidence stood erect,
holding me safe.
But this is its odious power.
To be tossed about
into the reins of panic,
walls crumbling as I watch myself
slowly
sinking
downward.
To know fear.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Practicing finding the right words to describe different emotions.
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Rula
6 months 3 weeks ago
Hello dear friend
You have never failed to amaze me with your themes ànd the diction-choice.
Your imagery as well is so vivid and authentic as well. I especially like:
"pieces of me scattering into pockets of empty spaces
where once a foundation of confidence stood erect,
holding me safe."
Do you think "experience fear" in the last line works better than "know fear" ? Just wondering.
Always appreciate sharing your wonderful penned
thoughts .
Thank you.
Lavender
6 months 2 weeks ago
Hello, Rula!
Every once in a while, I try to find words to describe different emotions, as in this poem. Fear is a complicated emotion. I appreciate your time here. I'll consider your suggestion.
Thank you, as always, my friend!
Lx
Leslie
6 months 2 weeks ago
L
What are you afraid of? Death itself I guess were all afraid of that. You shouldn't have any fears, not that I'm aware of. Your desires are impeccable. You'll be safe at the end! Nonethe less an expressive poem that tells about the realities of life.
Lavender
6 months 2 weeks ago
Hello, John,
What an endearing comment! Hmm... I don't think of death often at all, but I do think of aging, loneliness - all those human elements of natural life. I am very blessed with family and friends, and yes, in the end, there really is nothing to fear. Thank you for visiting and commenting. Much appreciated!
L