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Neopoem Of The Week Contest October 9th to October 15th 2022
feminine flower
Oddly less feminine,
was the flower
without the colour
who ate the bees with crunches and these
labor scents of oil and dirt
And nails was the petals that
hissed and spat
the flower, the wonder
who grew through
The legs of a man
Over under, near she ponder
I do slightly ever so wonder
How does one break the hand
Oddly less feminine the flower
Who lacked not the power
who pollinated herself with tender roots,
Who stole the sting from wasp alike,
a flower all white,
tore trees she strike
And born was she, or he, or thee
A flower not unlike you and me
The one without the identity
Recklessly,
Splendidly
was such thee
feminine flower
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 9 months ago
Could you
Give me a little hint. I’m feeling the theme of gender identity buried under the more obvious imagery. Am I tone deaf here?
The words are deep and can be interpreted many ways. I dig that type of thought provoking allegory.
Love this one,
Tim
Killer Bee
2 years 9 months ago
A little hint
You are not tone deaf sir! Gender identity is one of the main themes for this poem, about not having to be 'she' or 'he' or anything at all. I often experience this myself, on certain days I feel nothing feminine about myself and then other days I feel differently.
Obadiah Grey
2 years 9 months ago
Intriguing piece, some
Intriguing piece, some wonderful poetic lines and phrases,
though, perhaps a tad too ambiguous?
hindered (for me) by the format and punctuation.
Its one I'll certainly re-read.
Obi.