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Apr 09, 2015
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fools in a paradise
We all live
in a fool's paradise
believe me
It is only a mental surmise
so rise
to the occurrence of today
tomorrow may come
It may not...
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
judyanne
10 years 3 months ago
culled
The first part repeats the thought - we live in a fools paradise/there is no paradise....(waffle)
and imo, it needs stanza breaks
we all live
in a fool's paradise
believe me
It is only a mental surmise
so rise
to the occurrence of today
tomorrow may come
It may not...
Totally imo only, remember
love judy
xxx