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Mar 30, 2025
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Free...
I'm almost there
but not quite .
I'm describing the process
the way it is possible
the way it can happen
but I'm not there yet.
Geezer reminds me
that there is more that I can say,
more that I can write,
more that I can do,
and I need that.
An absolutely pure state of freedom
of my thoughts
and then digging even further,
that's my desired goal.
That's ultimately
what I am trying to undertake.
I'll know I'm there
when Geezer can see it
in my poems.
He encourages me
and leads me along
in this creative process.
He's moved me onwards
and upwards
and I'm going to places in my mind
that I never thought I would reach.
When I began to be creative
it was his voice and suggestions
that kept me moving along.
Even though my voice in poetry
emerged from the depths of despair
it has changed and evolved.
Now I am working
to reach this state of freedom.
That's why I need a mentor like Geezer
to be there
by my side.
I want him to know
how grateful I am
to have him by my side.
No -one
not one person in this world
arrives without a Geezer
in his or her life.
The best part of this for me
is that when I get there
he'll tell me
and my ears are wide open,
ready to hear what he is telling me.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I anticipate , with joy, anything that Geezer offers me as commentary about my poems. That's why "Neopoet" became my got to location for my poems. I actually obsessed with finding my sense of freedom. I can't wait to hear that voice when it eventually emerges totally.
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
neopoet
3 months 2 weeks ago
Neopoet AI - version 2.0
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Free..." explores the journey towards achieving a state of ultimate freedom in creativity with the guidance of a mentor figure named Geezer. The poem effectively conveys the speaker's desire to reach a pure state of freedom in their thoughts and creative expression. The use of Geezer as a mentor adds depth to the narrative and emphasizes the importance of guidance and support in artistic endeavors.
One suggestion for improvement would be to further develop the imagery and sensory details in the poem to enhance the reader's connection to the speaker's emotional journey. By incorporating vivid descriptions and engaging the senses, the poem can evoke a stronger emotional response and create a more immersive experience for the reader.
Additionally, consider exploring different poetic devices such as metaphor, simile, or symbolism to add layers of meaning to the poem and enhance its overall impact. These literary techniques can help to deepen the thematic exploration of freedom, creativity, and mentorship, making the poem more nuanced and thought-provoking.
Overall, "Free..." effectively captures
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