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Dec 30, 2024
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Friendship’s Quiet Flame
Friendship's flame, not a wild, but steady light.
It warms my soul through shadowed depths of night.
Mine burns with life’s softest hues, calm and true,
In quiet hearts, where words need not ensue.
It isn’t forged in throngs or fleeting crowds,
Nor shouted high by boastful voices loud.
It lives within my sister’s knowing glance,
And laughter shared with him, my soul’s own dance.
No need to chase what’s fleeting, bold, or grand,
For friendship rests within a steady hand.
Its roots entwine in memories deeply sown,
And dreams of future joys yet to be grown.
Yet still I dream, as dreamers often do,
Of friends unknown who’ll share a bond as true.
Perhaps I guard my thoughts, protect my space,
But warmth is written plainly on my face.
Unspoken ties, like whispers on the air,
Are friendship’s gifts, a love beyond compare.
About This Poem
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
5 months 3 weeks ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
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Geezer
5 months 3 weeks ago
I think...
that a few subtle changes might make this a stunner.
I am not suggesting that you take my efforts to smooth things out as gospel, but suggestions only.
Friendship's flame, not a wild, but steady light.
It warms my soul through shadowed depths of night.
Mine burns with some gentler hues, calm and true,
In quiet hearts, where words need not ensue.
Omit the apostrophe in [friends].
I like this much! ~ Geez.
.
Ruby Lord
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hi Geezer, thank you for
Hi Geezer, thank you for reading and commenting. I always like to read your informative responses. I've used most of your suggestions. Thank you for pointing out my typo, apostrophe, doh! And for your smooth suggestions.
Mine burns with some gentler hues, calm and true,
Mine burns with life’s softest hues, calm and true,
I preferred softest to some. I know I'm a pedant but I have a real problem with some and something, so I usually try to avoid the word.
Much appreciated, it does read better now. Ruby xxx :)
Geezer
5 months 3 weeks ago
Nice job...
okay with me, [about some and something]. ~ Geez.
.
Juarez5656
5 months 3 weeks ago
I definitely
liked the title, “Friendship’s Quiet Flame”, and your elaboration on it.
Ruby Lord
5 months 3 weeks ago
Thank you for reading and
Thank you for reading and commenting. I like the title too and it is an open and honest reflection of the friends I have maintained in my life. I do have other friends but they are the ones I think about occasionally. Ruby xxx :)
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Friendship's Quiet Flame
Hello, Ruby,
I, too, like the title. And this is how it is - a forever quiet flame, subtle but always gently burning. Your engaging sonnet makes me think of the long lasting friendships in my life.
Thank you!
L
Ruby Lord
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hi Lavender, thank you for
Hi Lavender, thank you for reading and commenting, I do appreciate your support. I often think I can't be the only one who lives such a quiet life as I do. Don't you just love the peace of being alone some days ha ha? Happy new year and take care Ruby xxx :)
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, Ruby,
I absolutely do! I thrive on it, actually. Love to be around family, friends, and social gatherings. But I always need to reconnect and be grounded afterward. We all have different natures, and I used to fight the need for positive solitude, but in recent years I've accepted it.
Your poem is gentle, like most lasting, sincere friendships.
Lx