Gators glory!

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

The poem adopts a narrative approach, immersing the reader in a dramatic encounter with an alligator. The use of colloquial language in the opening lines (“Wild jaws a flappin’, / reptilian tail a slappin’”) establishes a playful yet ominous tone, effectively setting the scene. The poem maintains a consistent focus on the physicality and menace of the alligator, using vivid imagery such as “little green beady eyes” and “death roll twice” to evoke tension and fear.

The rhyme scheme is irregular, with some couplets and slant rhymes, but this inconsistency can disrupt the poem’s rhythm. For example, “eyes / compromise / die” in the second stanza creates a near-rhyme that is not fully resolved, which may distract from the poem’s momentum. Additionally, the shift between rhyme and non-rhyme in later stanzas (“Head from shoulders, / arms from legs”) further fragments the flow.

The poem’s perspective shifts between the alligator and the victim, sometimes using direct address (“hoping you’re not going to die!”) and sometimes using third-person narration. This can create confusion about the narrative voice. Greater consistency in perspective could strengthen the poem’s emotional impact.

There are several instances where word choice could be refined for clarity or effect. For example, “You’re broken body / He’ll exhume at will!” uses “exhume” in a context that suggests digging up a corpse, which may not align with the imagery of the alligator’s immediate predation. Consider whether this verb best serves the intended meaning.

The poem’s pacing is generally effective, with shorter lines in moments of heightened tension (“Your heart is racing / lungs on fire!”), which mirrors the panic of the victim. However, some stanzas could benefit from more precise enjambment or punctuation to clarify meaning and control the reading experience.

Overall, the poem succeeds in creating a vivid and suspenseful encounter, but could be strengthened by attending to consistency in rhyme, perspective, and word choice. Greater attention to line breaks and punctuation would also enhance clarity and impact.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact

to see the gradual reduction of rhyme here, was it intentional? I have been watching a lot of docuseries

about dinosaurs and the reptiles that they have become; so, I picked up on the fact that it was an alligator or crocodile that was the subject. I'm not sure that I would fix the piece to make the rhyme. 

~ Geez.

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Ha, ha!  Your Last Few Words -  just for fun!  Too funny!  Although pretty gruesome, it is a captivating poem!  I noticed the style change, too, and agree that I don't know if I'd change it. Great title!

Thank you!

L