#haiku 2

flowers fragrance called
soon bees enfolded petals
relishing nectar

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Nigeria

Favorite Poets: Jess Tapper , Shakepeare, Akinwande Olowole Babatunde Soyinka, Eumolpus, themoonman.

Comments

Marvel Godwyn

7 years 5 months ago

Thank you so much remark, I

Thank you so much remark, I appreciate this comment so much.

weirdelf

7 years 5 months ago

Nice, Marvel,

no where near as good as the first one I read. Try numbering them so we can compare them and refer to them.

I suggested you name your sonnets, because not to compares oneself to Shakespeare, which comparison none of us can sustain!
So maybe just number the haikus, which are not supposed to be named.

Marvel Godwyn

7 years 5 months ago

Alright Jess, I will do the

Alright Jess, I will do the numbering.Thanks for the comment Jess.

weirdelf

7 years 5 months ago

Haiku are meant to stand each alone

but us poets just fucking love breaking the rules,eh?
This is a series of haiku/senryu I did on a theme.
https://www.neopoet.com/node/2669