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WonderGolly
Feb 06, 2012 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

A Heated Desire

I’ve seen and breathed and felt
The wood-works
The earthworks
The weavings
The paintings
And the writings
Project images of realities
And my heart pounded countless times
And restless like a heated desire
That makes me yearn to journey more
Into the past, and the present
And the days yet to dawn upon our moor
With the beauties of these hands
Mentored by the mind's eyes.
This heated desire
Is a true journey to an origin
Of a magic world hidden inside us.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Volta / GH, GHA

Favorite Poets: Kofi Awoonor, Kofi Anyidoho, ... :(

More from this author

Comments

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

13 years 5 months ago

Dear WonderGolly,

line 1: breathed for breath (past tense)
line 8: pounded for pound (past tense)

My favorite lines:

And the days yet to dawn upon our moor
With the beauties of these hands
Mentored by the mind's eyes.
This heated desire
Is a true journey to an origin
Of a magic world hidden inside us.

filled with feelings of passion and a zest for living!
always, Cat

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WonderGolly

13 years 5 months ago

Candlewitch,,

sorry for taking long to respond. was offline line for some days. Now, I'm back.
Thanks for your comment and the corrections. I admit, my grammar is a bit shaky. I'll do the corrections.
thank you.
respects

WonderGolly :)

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WonderGolly

13 years 4 months ago

Hi Candlewitch,,,,

I haven't words enough to thank you for continuous reading of my works and the corrections. I have a lot to learn and I am grateful to have you around.
respects

WonderGolly :)

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 4 months ago

hi

I think your work good
very deep understanding the inner self is a challenge to write well you did very well

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WonderGolly

13 years 4 months ago

nice to have you around. A

nice to have you around. A Heated Desire is a understanding of the self and an appreciation of the marvelous works of other craftsmen whose art / creativity inspire us to bring out the hidden talent / beauty in us.
thanks for the read.
respects.

WonderGolly :)

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WonderGolly

13 years 4 months ago

hahaha!!!

I'll take that as an Irony coming from a teacher to a student. Actually, a Heated Desire was composed from reading the works of masters / teachers like you.
Me, I am just another naive amateur writing verses. lolz.
respects.

WonderGolly :)

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 4 months ago

born to teach i am

Poetry writing I'm still learning from you and everyone here. Teachers learn from student and vice-versa.

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WonderGolly

13 years 4 months ago

You're right

Learning is never done. It's an endless process.
but in the poetry class, the teacher is always the teacher.
and the student knows his place, a student. lolz
respects.

WonderGolly :)

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 4 months ago

maybe true

But here at Neopoet we are a family with talents each its own that help us all become better poets.
You may be an amateur as you say, but still the qualities in your work teaches even if you are not incline to do so :)

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WonderGolly

13 years 3 months ago

True

we learn from each others work. Personally, some of the WORKSHOP
submission and feedback have been helpful.
neopeot is a lovely community to be a part of.
respects.

WonderGolly :)

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 3 months ago

great

I have a workshop coming up on "meters for absolute beginers" shortly why not join. You'll have fun.

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WonderGolly

13 years 3 months ago

wonderful

thanks for informing me. meters/ hexameter/pentameter etc,
I have a really serious problem understanding them.
To be frank, I don't even know if I "unknowingly" apply them in my work. lolz.
so, I'll be looking forward to joining the workshop.
respects:

WonderGolly :)