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This poem is part of the contest:

Do you use devices in freeform

(Read More...)

HISTORY (September Contest)

How will we be judged
by distant descendants
far in the future?

Perhaps they'll think us unevolved
still fighting wars over religion
although violence leaves questions unsolved
or worst lead us to being cursed
to kill again....and again.

Or perhaps their thoughts of us
will be...kind
(if they think of us at all).
Perhaps they'll overlook the bad
and realize we did the best we could.
Worst? Best?Is our time here simply a test?

Will our grade be pass/fail
or will they grade us at all
as they wonder a dystopian wasteland
we bestowed on them?

Or will we be seen
in retrospect
as pioneers

In space, in time, in philosophy
who showed them all is possible
in a paradise on earth
and other places, other spaces.

As imperfect as we are
I worry.
Will they understand us?

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I can't believe I have the balls to submit this in a Free verse contest lol

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost, Burns, Longfellow, Poe, and Johnson. I guess you've noticed these are all past masters. Other than folks on site I don't read any contemporary poets .

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 9 months ago

I like...

your free-form poem, but I don't see a poetic device in use here. Maybe look at the link given to see how you can incorporate one? ~ Geez.
.

S

scribbler

3 years 9 months ago

Hmmm.....

So the examples of alliteration and internal rhyme didn't come across?

Obadiah Grey

Obadiah Grey

3 years 9 months ago

Thought they came across just

Thought they came across just fine, perhaps sparse, perhaps a tad remote, but all the better for that.

All in all,,,,, I liked it, cheers.

Obi.

S

scribbler

3 years 9 months ago

Hi Obi

Perhaps I need to edit to clarify the devices

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 9 months ago

Sorry...

I guess my focus was too narrow. LoL I get it now, but still as Obi says; a little vague. ~ Geez.
.

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 9 months ago

I can't believe...

how badly I missed on this one. Must be having flashbacks or something! A thousand apologies. I'll take my beating with a vague sledge-hammer and hope that I am forgiven for my inexcusable crap..~ Geez.
.

S

scribbler

3 years 9 months ago

Your opinion

means a lot to me. And I already see some places I can improve this. No need apologize

Seren

Seren

3 years 9 months ago

Oh my... Bro!!!

This is my kind of poetry and you know it. I adored it. I didn't read anyone above me so as not to be swayed. I hadn't read the parameters for the contest yet but I will in the morning it's 4.44am I always write at this time of day as you know.

I think it's a brilliant poem.

Much love and hugs Sis x

S

scribbler

3 years 9 months ago

hi Jayne

Sometimes i attempt free verse just to see if I can lol. Thanks for your kind words and stay safe down yonder