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Oct 28, 2010
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I assume (edit)
A tip with greens and tangerines
attach to some large thing beyond
the frame's geometry, for granted
and on blue
Mathematical? Not like the hour
I look away from what is crumpled,
and see nothing
And I assume
the garden chairs still lie about
Crickets in what I thought was
grass,- (their number troubles
me), but one
Beneath the cotton parasol
About This Poem
Last Few Words: A slight edit of an old write. Thanks for reading. e.
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Comments
DawningDaytripper
14 years 8 months ago
Some interesting
Some interesting contradictions that draw my attention Doorman.
Good read,
Julie
D.D.
doorman
14 years 8 months ago
Contradictions
Hi Julie,
Thanks for reading, though I'm curious as to where you read these contradictions. Always interesting to see things through the eyes of others.
Best regards,
Espen.
doorman
14 years 8 months ago
Xena
I remember writing this in my room. Looking out of the window there's a fruit tree revealed only by a branch that dips into the square frame(depending where you sit, of course), with the backdrop of the blue sky. From here things get vague, but it has to do with relying on memory to confirm unseen surroundings and how fragile that can be. To me, memory and imagination are closely linked, and the less I remember the more I assume,- to the point where whatever rests in the garden below, or under that parasol becomes strange, perhaps even frightening.
So, to answer your question would be to betray the question in the write. However, I'm very pleased that you asked because my memory of that morning has become more hazy and I'm more inclined to ask myself the same question.
Explaining poems can be a real killer, but this is a workshop after all. Kill your darlings is a good way to grow.
Hope this was helpful, and don't hold back any other questions you might have.
Best regards,
Espen.
doorman
14 years 8 months ago
Dear Shirley
A sincere thanks to you for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed the write.
Best wishes,
Espen.
Victorclaude
14 years 8 months ago
"Not like the hour
"Not like the hour
I look away from what is crumpled,
and see nothing"
Something about these that just allows one's mind to wander past limits of where it has been before, or thinks boundaries were limits, when there are really no boundaries at all.
Victor
doorman
14 years 8 months ago
Victor
It's refreshing to hear one's lines being bent in new directions. Thanks for sharing your view. It's greatly appreciated.
Best regards,
Espen.
doorman
14 years 8 months ago
Dear Jayne-Chloe
Thank you, once more, for your treasured attention.
Yours,
Espen.