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Dec 10, 2024
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I can’t call it
The only friend I have
is the one that butt-dials me.
At least they cared enough
to enter my number,
but not as much to save me.
About This Poem
Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
6 months 2 weeks ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
This poem explores the theme of loneliness and the complexities of human relationships. The use of humor in the first line adds a light-hearted tone to the poem, contrasting with the underlying sense of isolation conveyed in the subsequent lines. The juxtaposition of someone accidentally calling the speaker with the speaker's feelings of being uncared for creates a poignant reflection on the nature of friendship and connection. Consider further developing the emotions and thoughts surrounding this dynamic to deepen the impact of the poem on the reader. Additionally, exploring different poetic devices such as metaphor or symbolism could enhance the overall depth and complexity of the piece.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Rula
6 months 2 weeks ago
Tawny
I thought this is clever and crisp.
Good one.
Thank you for sharing!
Best wishes.
(Butt) should be {but}?
Sen99
6 months 2 weeks ago
Good Brevity
A friend is one who mis-dials, nice thought.
Clentin
6 months 1 week ago
It seems they have you on
It seems they have you on their______mind!
Good poem, consise