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Phaizee
Jul 17, 2022 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the contest:

Summertime Blues

(Read More...)

I'm tired

Aches all over,
Tears absorbed by my pillow,
I'm tired of the state of the world.

The great giant lies asleep,
And people, nothing but sheeps in a den of lions.
Dreams like the dead withered ashes.
Ashes, Ashes... Nothingness, Darkness in Anxiety's breath

I wonder when this fate shall be reborn.
Is there sun after the rain?
Will we gain these faded colours again?

Untill then I weep,
I groan,
I cry,
For there's nothing in the sky.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Today, society continues to scare me that I worry about what the future lies. I hope that the sun shall shine again.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Fct, NGA

Favorite Poets: Wole Soyinka , William Shakespeare

More from this author

Comments

Warrior Princess

Warrior Princess

2 years 11 months ago

Hi Phaizee I felt the

Hi Phaizee I felt the despondency, hopelessness and frustration in your poem. It seems as if you could not even find the hero within yourself to face the challenges of this world. It seems like people around you cannot be trusted and so you wallow in tears with your frustration. This piece was emotionally felt by me.

Rosewood Apothecary

Rosewood Apothecary

2 years 11 months ago

I think

This is our first interaction. I also think the same way about the world and I also write to express it.

Overall it’s a good poem. I do wonder if the colors will return.

Nice job,
Tim

Rosewood Apothecary

Rosewood Apothecary

2 years 11 months ago

I think

This is our first interaction. I also think the same way about the world and I also write to express it.

Overall it’s a good poem. I do wonder if the colors will return.

Nice job,
Tim

RoseBlack

RoseBlack

2 years 11 months ago

A good write

The feelings of despair, hopelessness and exhaustion were conveyed in an eloquent way. Good job