I'm a winner

It isn't just the sun
or even the blue sky
so bright and clear.
No, it isn't just
on the outside
with my smiling face
and my cheerful disposition.
On the inside,
deep inside
I feel like I'm a winner.
On the way back from Interact
I was smiling
quite broadly
because I feel like
the gogetter that I am.
Everything is open
for me.
Everything is there
for me
to solve
resolve
and complete.
That's the best part
of being a winner.
You can do all that
and more.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Bruce told me that I was a winner. He said it to me when I didn't believe it, but now I do. I really have become the winner he suggested to me. It's wonderful.

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Country/Region: VIC

Favorite Poets: Dorothea McKellar, Henry Lawson, Banjo Paterson

Comments

neopoet

5 months ago

Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "I'm a winner" conveys a sense of confidence and self-assurance. The imagery of the sun, blue sky, and the speaker's smiling face creates a positive and optimistic tone. The repetition of phrases like "I feel like I'm a winner" and "Everything is open for me" reinforces the theme of success and empowerment. However, the poem could benefit from more specific details or concrete examples to make the emotions and experiences more vivid and relatable to the reader. Consider expanding on the challenges overcome or the specific achievements that make the speaker feel like a winner. Additionally, varying the structure or rhythm of the poem could enhance its impact and keep the reader engaged throughout.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact