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Oct 20, 2022
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Implosions
We are born in gaseous nebulas
Ethereal vapors too beautiful for eyes
Yet this fabric must collapse
In order to birth you, a star
Massive energy neatly compressed
Into a beacon of gorgeous fire
From distances vast they appear
Twinkling dew drops on a black canopy
We gaze up in awe and wonder
Never knowing the incredible forces
Residing under the radiant surface
A fusion of ideas continuously churns
Inside the star the ideas become heavy
Dense ideas bring the threat of implosion
We are but stars, we carry these traits
In order to grow we must first not implode
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Probably not my best. I was upset and venting.
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 8 months ago
I love when...
I read a piece and don't have to look for the meaning
in between enigmatic lines! Of course, the meaning doesn't have to
be put bluntly either like; "I'm having a really bad fking day."
To see the "wonder and complexity" of a human-being and feel the connection
with the cosmos, is a beautiful thing! Yes, there are stars that go super-nova
first imploding and then exploding or whatever; [I'm not sure of the sequence of events]
but you don't need to be a scientist, to see what you are talking about.
I think this is just about keeping control, while trying to grow and become a beautiful star.
You are, you know?
Your title drew me in, as a title is supposed to do, your language
is great [as always] and I enjoyed the theme and thoughts behind the lines.
Please, vent more often.
~ Geez.
.