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Sep 03, 2014
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infinitesimal regrets
As infinitesimal leaves of my soul
cling to the page
as the blood of mine enemies
become magenta ink
I slowly unravel tragedies arms
farther than this soul piece
and far deeper than a mind
aggrandized by a liar
I've unmasked the bastard living
by my lifeblood and choking as
each word, moves toward death
and karmas final task
We met in the shadow of death and dawn,
savoring a last shared breath, tasting,
tomorrows that began and ended,
in that first gasp of light, But
before the next movement, was regret...
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Lonnie
10 years 10 months ago
Jayne
Not entirely sure what to make of this one, but it is intriguing enough to stand out and say, "Hey, Read Me!" You are ever-evolving as a poetess, and your craft is memorable, to say the least! I may have to re-read this several times to make my poor brain understand it better! LOL!!
alidzain
10 years 10 months ago
Hi Jayne
This is quite a powerful piece for me. There's raw emotion throughout the poem within every word. Kudos, angel.
i spit on the nerve of scums
who dare to dictate my life
when their own life are in shambles
dying without the will to strive
while hope slips away unnoticed
like the many chances they ignored
i wish their prattle will cease
but they won't, so I walked out of the door
and if they still don't get the hint
I don't care anymore...
Alid
mand
10 years 10 months ago
Hi Jayne!
I'm in agreement with Lonnie and Alid on this one. The poem is deep ( of a personal nature I suspect ). The words you use are powerful and descriptive - but to get the full import of this poem I'm goin to have to reread it and ponder! So I'll be back ( as Arnie says - lol ).
Remember no fallin on your ass!
Love Mand xxxx
Ian.T
10 years 10 months ago
Jayne
Just turn and walk away, it will be hard but as your legs improve so the distance from those bad dreams will increase.
Just use your think to see the door held open for you, there on the other side is the now, all those yesterdays, will fade.
If there is anything you need, just ask with the think, the children will show you the way, just believe in all the things you are.
The feelings you have are as a sun they give life to all things around you, now just use some of that energy for you, to hell with anyone that wants to hide your light.
In writing and belonging to the ether places here, the things in life and the reaction to many things sometimes makes me very sad but with you now there is a broad smile and a future, this poem shows that the perspective is strong and you are moving on.
Take care out there, it's late I have to go, Night or is it
"Good Morning Australia,"
Yours as always Ian x
infinitesimal denoted "one over infinity" in area calculations. x
alidzain
10 years 10 months ago
Jayne
Might help if you have a mental picture of a door you can slam shut on their faces. That's one of the ways I deal with the likes of them, hun. Don't let them get to you. Its unhealthy. Some people just ain't worth it.
love
Alid
live well, live happy