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crypticbard
crypticbard
Apr 21, 2025 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

inimitable

As a projectile
on its trajectory
the very kernel
of this heart’s history

unfurls and beckons
to those who’d care
allows for both sides,
their minds declare

each line, each verse,
each accentuated pause
all bring together- - joint longing:
their inimitable cause

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: West Moreton, AUS

Favorite Poets: There is nothing quite as boring as a life completely devoid of shadows.

More from this author

Comments

neopoet

neopoet

2 months 3 weeks ago

Neopoet AI - version 2.0

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "inimitable" explores themes of personal history, connection, and longing through the metaphor of a projectile on its trajectory. The imagery of the heart's history unfurling and beckoning to those who care is evocative and creates a sense of vulnerability and openness. The use of enjambment and pauses in the poem effectively conveys a sense of reflection and contemplation. However, there are areas where the poem could be strengthened. Consider refining the structure and flow of the poem to enhance the overall coherence and impact of the message. Additionally, further exploration of the central theme of inimitability could add depth and complexity to the poem.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

2 months 3 weeks ago

my dear bard...

You do NOT need to restructure!!! IA is off its wig! I think it is great as is and I enjoyed both structure and flow!!! the message stays with me...I am in sync with it! favorite lines are:

unfurls and beckons
to those who’d care
allows for both sides,
their minds declare

fondly, Cat

Frederick Kesner

Frederick Kesner

2 months 3 weeks ago

Now there's something to

Now there's something to behold - the wig of the infamous AI. Thanks Cat, consider does not entail any further action after the consideration. Most grateful to you :)

Rula

Rula

2 months 2 weeks ago

Hello fellow poet

I believe this best describes a place where one feels comfortable and in ease to express himself, or this is how I interpreted it. please pur me on the right tack if I've deviated.
I really enjoyed the internal rhymes as well as the ending ones.
Thank you for sharing!

Frederick Kesner

Frederick Kesner

2 months 2 weeks ago

Hello Rula, thanks so much

Hello Rula, thanks so much for dropping by and giving your time to my poem. Glad that you are on the right track: 'the comfort and even ease in expressing of self' is the platform on which it was envisioned; what happens on that platform could be arguably described as 'magic,' a dynamic between reader, writing, and writer in a symphony of sorts: an elevated form or manifestation of communication, perhaps? My gratitude and appreciation for connecting with your kind words. :)