Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Letting Go: Anton Ego
The table looms before him, stark and uninviting,
a battleground where plates meet judgment.
The critic sits rigid, pen gripped in a hand
ready to slash through reputation, its ink dark and merciless.
In the kitchen, the chef glares through the small window,
a low flame of resentment flickering in his eyes.
Every movement is sharp, precise—a rhythm of defiance.
The dish must speak for itself; his words,
in defence of his art, remain locked in his throat.
Anton waits, his gaze heavy and sharp.
Rumours swirled about the chef’s arrogance,
his reckless experiments, his disdain for simplicity.
As the minutes stretch, Anton’s irritation stirs,
already forming in his mind the lines of dismissal:
mediocrity masquerading as daring.
The plate arrives, sliding across the table—
a quiet challenge, its edges smudged imperfectly.
Anton lifts his fork with deliberate scepticism.
The chef stands in the corner, arms crossed,
the weight of failure already braced against his shoulders.
The fork presses into the layers. The critic pauses.
Steam curls up, carrying notes of familiarity.
Tomato tang pierces the air, mingling with the earthiness of aubergine.
Anton takes a bite, his expression unmoving.
Then—his brow furrows, lips twitching slightly.
Flavours bloom on his tongue, chaotic yet harmonious.
The chef looks away, muttering under his breath.
Anton swallows, and silence fills the room, heavy as the unspoken verdict.
His fork clinks against the plate as he sets it down.
The pen quivers in his hand, prepared for destruction—
yet he writes something unexpected.
“This dish,” he begins, “reminds us that elegance thrives in imperfection.”
The chef freezes, disbelief washing over his face.
Anton stands, his unyielding mask softened by the faintest smile,
and walks to the door, leaving his words to linger.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction: What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
3 months ago
Neopoet AI - version 2.0
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
It is not feasible to offer feedback.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Frederick Kesner
3 months ago
What does it mean “not feasible?”
Need more information please:
“ The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
It is not feasible to offer feedback.”
Need more guidance so as not to elicit that poorly worded feedback: “not feasible;” how so? And why so?
Ruby Lord
3 months ago
Hi Cryptic, I enjoyed your
Hi Cryptic, I enjoyed your poem because it is full of suspense and it raises the question of power and who holds it. The chef or the critic? I thought your imagery was fantastic and the outcome, perfect. Really great work, Ruby xx
Frederick Kesner
3 months ago
Thanks RubyLord
You are much appreciated! Glad the poem delivered.
Candlewitch
3 months ago
hello crypticbard,
It is very nice to see your work posted in the stream again! That is one of my favorite movies... "Ratatouille" ! You have captured Anton Ego precisely! I could see this scenario playing in my head! excellent writing! my favorite lines are:
“This dish,” he begins, “reminds us that elegance thrives in imperfection.”
The chef freezes, disbelief washing over his face.
Anton stands, his unyielding mask softened by the faintest smile,
and walks to the door, leaving his words to linger.
I really love this piece because its build in suspense is supremely edgy! and excellent!
fondly, Cat
Frederick Kesner
3 months ago
Thanks Cat
I must admit I was lost for a while what with the constant changes in our offline life and on-site as well. Too many changes for the likes of me. But I never left. Thank you so much for the warm welcome and most appreciated response to my latest post here. Hopefully this Is just the beginning of more of such interactions.
Ruby Lord
3 months ago
Ha ha, I didn't know it was
Ha ha, I didn't know it was based on a film/cartoon but it doesn't make any difference to my reading.
What a great scaffolding for a poem. That makes it even better. Ruby xx
Frederick Kesner
3 months ago
Yes indeed it was so inspired
Yes indeed it was so inspired. I usually put a note or disclaimer but somehow left 5hat out this time around. Thanks again RubyLord, you are much appreciated.
Geezer
3 months ago
Well done...
This dish speaks for itself. "Not feasible" is when the AI doesn't know how to respond to your work. I think that it has more human qualities than we might suspect. It knows enough to back off when it doesn't have a clue. Nice and tasty.
The last line leaves me wondering, lingering like what, like the taste or smell of ...whatever. Just an opinion, but I need to know what the last words lingered like. ~ Geez.
.
Frederick Kesner
3 months ago
Oh, thanks for that;
Oh, thanks for that; apóstolos was quick to respond and quite kind to explain AI’s quirks. It actually gave me a good review on a subsequent post… so the teething is going well thus far. I am of the mind to go through this again with your “eye” and see that prior knowledge or lack thereof is headed off. Back to you in this soon.